Pass the sick bag, Oscar is performing to the gallery
During his carefully considered remorse at the trial for the murder of Reeva Steenkamp, Oscar Pistorius has, in no particular order, retched several times into a bucket, howled, wept, sobbed and screamed.
No one, the athlete seems to imply, can possibly have suffered as grievously as he has. Except, lest we forget, his girlfriend, who sadly isn't alive to give us her assessment of her boyfriend's histrionics.
Cynics among us reckon that Pistorius is not mourning Reeva's life so much as fighting to save his own.
They claim the performance seems to be having the desired effect, with television reporters commenting favourably on his "genuine display of emotion".
Pistorius's tearful "apology" in court to Reeva's parents for the "pain, sorrow and emptiness I've caused" was the highlight. The look that June Steenkamp gave the man who fired four bullets through a locked toilet door into her beautiful daughter was magnificent in its contemptuousness. She would have turned him to stone if she could.
Nor does the judge, another older woman, Thokozile Masipa, look the slightest bit impressed by Pistorius's operatic sorrow. As Oscar continues to retch into his bucket, let us not forget that, every eight hours in South Africa, a woman is killed by her male partner. That really is sickening. (© Daily Telegraph, London)