Wednesday 23 January 2019

9 terrifying stories that prove geese are in fact evil

Seriously, stay the heck out of their way.

A terrifying herd of geese
A terrifying herd of geese

By Alistair Mason, Press Association

If you’ve ever got on the wrong side of a goose, you’ll know they can be surprisingly vicious creatures.

With this in mind, user ABigNothingBurger took to Reddit to ask people: “What’s your worst experience with a goose?”

And sure enough, lots of people have had very bad experiences with geese.

1. Geese are evil

Goose GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

2. Seriously though, geese are evil

“When I visited Malaysia, there were some wild geese were some relatives lived. If you were riding your motorcycle near them, they’d try to pull you off. I don’t think they were ever successful. Probably because I heard someone killed them before they scored a kill themselves. Not gonna say I’m upset about that.” – retrorhythms

3. What more proof do you need that geese are evil?

Mercy No GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

4. They’re so evil they need to be fought off with guns

5. Run for your lives, the evil geese are taking over

“Went to a very very very small college, one entrance in and out of campus. My freshman year a science class (can’t remember which) decided to do a research project on goslings so they somehow attracted geese/got some geese onto campus (not really sure of these details) and after 3 years the geese had multiplied. This wouldn’t be a problem except they protect their nests like crazy and after 3 years there were 3 different nests perfectly triangulated so anywhere you were on campus you’d be in the goose attack danger zone. Walking to class? Goose attack. Want to go to the dining hall? Goose attack. Take a nice walk through the arboretum? Goose attack. Worst experience personally: offending a goose by trying to get to my car and leave, 2 chased me and started pecking my car, the dents were there until the day my car died. Eventually the school had the geese moved to some sanctuary/farm. Or that’s what they told us, could be the same farm my childhood dog went to, who knows.” – notjanelane

Down The Street Walking GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

6. See, even dead geese are evil

7. Geese are evil but they’re no match for Grandma

Giggle Geese GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

8. Geese probably think we’re evil too tbf

“My brother and I used to have a pump bb gun that we would use to scare the birds off our dock. The first time I was allowed to shoot, my dad was explaining what to do and not to worry ’cause the only way you would kill a goose is if you happened to hit them right through the neck. Being that I was like 6 years old and they were between 50 and 80 yards from us everything should have been fine.

“Well, first shot, goose down. I gave my dad the gun and ran inside crying.” – milleribsen

9. Actually we’re with the goose on this one. Leave the geese alone

Goose Dancing GIF by Cheezburger - Find & Share on GIPHY

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