What the readers say
Are you sure you're 38? You sound very naive. In fact, to be honest, you sound a bit like an alien that's just dropped down from Mars. How can you have got to this age without connecting with a single person of the opposite sex? Even your long-term relationship sounds unrealistically peaceful; You never had a row?
It's very old-fashioned to put up with such a passionless relationship. Do you think you lack an example of a happy, equal partnership? Maybe your parents were together for the sake of it and you think that is all that you deserve too. Find some fire in your soul, get out there and be yourself. You only live once!
It's tough for shy people nowadays; in fact, anyone who does not go around acting like a pop diva -- with the clothes to match -- tends to get ignored. Therefore, my advice would be to either get some kind of major makeover or ditch the bars altogether and join some clubs where more interesting things happen. Busy yourself with an evening course or hobby that will give you something to talk about when you do encounter men.
You need to focus on who you are rather than on why you don't get any male attention. If you want some passion in your life, don't be afraid to show that you are a passionate person. Talk about things that irritate you, interest you and make you laugh. Then you will shine.