Monday 18 December 2017

Five reasons you might be being 'stashed' by your new romantic partner

Stock image
Stock image

Rachel Hoise

The chances are you won’t have realised what was happening, but you may have been stashed by past lovers.

Picture the scene: you’ve been seeing your new guy or gal for a few months perhaps. You’re not officially boyfriend and girlfriend but you hang out regularly and you’re pretty sure you’re seeing each other exclusively.

They’ve joined you and your mates for a boozy weekend BBQ, tagged along to Friday night work drinks with your colleagues and even met your parents over brunch.

But then it hits you: they haven’t introduced you to any of their friends or family. The closest you may have got to their inner circle is bumping into their flatmate coming out of the loo at 3am.

Well you, my friend, have been stashed. I’m so sorry for you.

There are other signs to look out for too, according to Metro.

We all know the first social media mention of the new person you’re seeing is a Big Deal, so if you’ve posted a selfie from that festival you went to together and regularly tag them in memes but they’ve failed to acknowledge your existence, it’s not looking great.

But why does this happen? Don’t despair.

Here are five reasons you may be being stashed:

1. They’re embarrassed by you

Brutal but possible. And obviously reason to dump them. If your new bed partner doesn’t want to be seen with you or for other people to know you’re courting, he or she is not the one. Everyone deserves someone who wants to shout from the rooftops about how amazing you are (although hopefully they have enough sanity to resist the urge).

2. They don’t see you as a long-term prospect

If as far as they’re concerned this is nothing more than a casual fling, it could explain why they’re so reluctant introduce you to the people in their life. And if they don’t see you two becoming something serious, they’re obviously not going to be posting Instagrams of “brunch with bae.” Sorry.

3. They want you all to themselves

If someone is really insecure about you leaving them, it could explain why they haven’t introduced you to any of their friends. Let’s be honest - all of us have the “hot one” in the group, and if your new guy or gal is paranoid that you’ll fancy Sam the swimwear model or Polly the personal trainer more, they may be reluctant to introduce you. But that says more about their insecurities than anything else.

4. They don’t have any friends

Do they have less than 200 friends on Facebook? Are they always free whenever you suggest meeting up? Well then it’s possible they simply don’t have any friends. Which could be cause for concern.

There’s nothing wrong with quality over quantity when it comes to friends, but if your latest squeeze has no one else in their life but you, it may be a red flag.

5. Their friends are awful humans

By nature of being friends with you, your friends must be, of course, fabulous. And if your latest suitor’s chums are just a bit rubbish - immature, rude, sexist, laddish, gossipy - how could they possibly compete with yours?

The same goes for their family. Your new love interest may be worried you’ll go off them if you meet their embarrassing aunt Mildred and annoying younger brother.

But if you suspect you are being stashed, it’s probably best to just confront your new guy or gal and find out what’s going on. No one should be stashed away.

Independent News Service

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