Wednesday 22 May 2019

Ask Brian: My girlfriend is trying to become an 'influencer' and it's doing my head in

Our no-nonsense agony uncle gets straight to the point of your most pressing issues

(Stock Image)
(Stock Image)
Brian O'Reilly

Brian O'Reilly

My girlfriend has decided she wants to be one of these social media "influencers".

Basically, she wants free stuff and to be a pretend celebrity.

That's grand, but literally every moment together she's trying to snap this or boomerang that and put it on social media.

She's never not taking selfies or pictures of our food. It's doing my head in.

When she's not doing that, she's on her Instagram doing 'follow-sprees' trying to get as many followers as possible back.

She's even looking up click farm companies that give your profile likes for money. It's gone mad.

If she's happy doing that fine - but I don't want it interfering in our realtionship. How do I put a stop to it?

Brian replies:

My friend, I hear you.

Do you remember the days when every second person you met hadn't just set you their YouTube channel or become a "content creator"? Yeah, 2015 was a sweet time. We didn't know how good we had it.

If it's any consolation, the chances or her being successful are slim-to-none. There are a handful of successful 'influencers' in Ireland, people who've gained a large following through being entertaining and offering something engaging to their followers.

Maybe your girlfriend will be the next make-up-food-fairy-Insta-stun-hun, but the chances are she won't.

The chances are she just wants her 15 minutes and, let's face it, some free bits. It will pass.

Businesses are also becoming very savvy on those who have genuine 'influence' over followers, and those who have a credit card and a good south east Asian click farm. So it probably won't happen for her.

That doesn't make it any less annoying when you're together and she feels the need to document every moment for her tens and tens of semi-interested fans.

I've honestly cut friends out of my life for making me pause an extra 14 seconds so they could take a picture of our food in a restaurant. I don't need that sort of negative influence in my life.

In a slightly shocking piece of advice, I think you need to talk to her. You need to explain that you're finding her behaviour distracting and frustrating and it's putting strain on your relationship.

Ask her to knock it on the head when you're around, explain you want time with her and not her smartphone.

She may not even realise how annoying she's being, so give her the chance to adjust her behaviour.

If the talking doesn't work, write back and I can offer you more advice on how to break her phone and make it look like an accident. 


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