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Paul Galvin: Just ask the missus

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‘Arthur’
brogue,
¤100, Ask
the Missus
at Office

‘Arthur’ brogue, ¤100, Ask the Missus at Office

High tops,
¤70,
Gorillaz
Chuck
Taylor All
Star at
Office

High tops, ¤70, Gorillaz Chuck Taylor All Star at Office

Low tops, €65,
Gorillaz Chuck
Taylor All Star
at Office

Low tops, €65, Gorillaz Chuck Taylor All Star at Office

‘Ridley’
sandal, ¤55,
Ask the
Missus at
Office

‘Ridley’ sandal, ¤55, Ask the Missus at Office

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‘Arthur’ brogue, ¤100, Ask the Missus at Office

'I wear large shoes. Very large. I have huge feet. It's embarrassing, actually.' Paul Galvin goes shopping for shoes

Just ask the missus

'I wear large shoes. Very large. I have huge feet. It's embarrassing, actually.' Paul Galvin goes shopping for shoes

I've been checking out the shoes in Office's Grafton Street store quite a bit lately. It's about the only 'office' I don't mind popping into.

Jolly nice place it is. Colourful and lively. Full of great shoes, too -- some of my favourite shoe brands under one roof: Adidas, Converse, Hudson, Fred Perry, Lacoste and the Office own brand, among others.

I bought a pair of Office boots a while back. Tan leather, three-hole desert boots. I love them. I'm not sure what I've been doing while I've been wearing them, but they're now covered in scuffs and scrape marks, which I quite like.

I have been known to manually prescribe such scrape marks to boots before, but these happened of their own accord. A shoe buff would call such a look 'artfully distressed'.

I've been wearing them with a black Kooples suit and I love how mismatched they look in contrast with designer clothes. Wrong but right.

Last week, I went for another nosy around Office and found another little gem of a shoe label, Ask the Missus. A conventional but inimitable brand for the man who wants to be stylish but still wants approval from 'er indoors.

Does such a man really exist? If you are such a man, let me urge caution. Asking the missus anything about clothes or shoes is a precarious course of action.

Men buying shoes is a serious business. We're sensitive about our clothes. We don't ask questions lightly -- it's an affront to our masculinity. So when we ask, we only want to hear positive replies.

We have the lads to think about too. What will they think? Then we have to pace up and down wearing them and do all those shoe-test things men do when weighing up whether to purchase or not.

It's every bit as tense and trying as buying a house or car.

There we are, stepping, pacing, twisting, turning, looking at them in the mirror, bending the old knee to see if they hurt the heels, creeping up on our tippy toes to see if they hurt our little piggies, checking where our big toe is at.

If you do ask the missus her opinion, there are a few points of information you should be aware of. Because the thing about asking the missus if she likes them is that you never quite know what kind of answer you'll get.

If she answers the question with another question, she's politely telling you she doesn't like them. She's one of those girls who's much smarter than you.

She knows you well enough to know a flat out "no" is going to hurt your feelings and you might throw a strop.

So, instead, she plants tiny seeds of doubt in your even tinier mind, knowing full well they will grow into full-blown paranoia to the point where you couldn't possibly buy the shoes and wear them in public.

There is something else men need to know. If the missus hates them and disses them in an overtly negative manner, you can be sure she's just p*ssed off over something else. Just rewind your memory 24/48 hours and you'll get to the bottom of it.

If you have p*ssed her off and want to make it up, there is something in Office for her, too. With the music festivals coming up this summer, she'd love the store's own-brand 'Coachella' sandal.

Exclusive to Office is a very cool collaboration between Converse and Gorillaz. Gorillaz co-founder Jamie Hewlett has designed four pairs of prints to make the Gorillaz Chuck Taylor All-Star collection.

How very fitting. The virtual band members are never out of their virtual Converse. They have even released a song to go with the collaboration called 'Do Ya Thing.' Shoes can do that for a man, after all.

They allow us to do our thing. Whatever way we want.

Our shoe size says a lot about us, of course, so say the girls. This much is true. I wear large shoes. Very large. Size 12. Sometimes size 13 even.

Honestly, I have huge feet. It's embarrassing actually. Don't believe me? Ask the missus.

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