Monday 20 November 2017

Top 20 football chants: From Mick Wallace to Fernando Torres

Manchester United's Luis Nani gets plenty of stick from fans about looking like Michael Jackson
Manchester United's Luis Nani gets plenty of stick from fans about looking like Michael Jackson

Soccer fans are no choir boys .....but boy do they love to sing.

Or more correctly chant about their favourite players while more often taking the michael out of one of their opponents. Which is why is Peter Crouch (6’ 7” tall) is greeted in virtually every away ground with the cry: ‘Does the Circus know you’re here’.

A trawl this week around the various club and fan-based web sites helped us compile our own Top 20 - which you can view here...

While many of these critical tongue-lashes are laced with foul and abusive language, it is very much part of the genre. And sometimes there is a degree of wit about the adaptation of well known songs to new words which actually make the po-faced chuckle.

For instance Celtic fans, on hearing that the goalkeeper of deadly rivals Andy Goran had been diagnosed with schizophrenia greeted him on their next meeting by chanting: “There’s only two Andy Gorams”.

Sometimes the response is just so spontaneous that the fun is in the simplicity. Sheffield United fans often rile their city rivals by declaring in unison “We hate Wednesday.”

As they did so in a game against Millwall, the Londoners responded: “And we hate Tuesdays.”

In attempting to come up with a Top 20 of football chants, it is necessary to delve into the bitter exchanges that go on between clubs from different cities. Manchester United fans find it hard to end a choral joust without a derogatory reference to Liverpool.

Hence when the Old Trafford faithful sing a dittie to their Korean star Ji Sung Park, they go (to the tune of Lord of the Dance)

“Park, Park, wherever you may be,
You eats dogs in your home country,
But it could be worse, you could be a scouse,
Eating rats in your council house.”

And where would chants be without a shade of green thrown in. When it comes to the Irish angle there is no one bigger than Niall Quinn or more colourful that recently elected Wexford TD, Mick Wallace.

Sunderland fans still gleefully sing the following (although a historic search shows it was first chanted by Man City fans when Big Niall played at Maine Road):

“Niall Quinn’s disco pants are the best,
They go up from his arse to his chest,
They’re better than Adam and the Ants,
Niall Quinn’s disco pants.

And Wexford Youths can take their place along the terrace tenors of Manchester or Liverpool when it comes to their pink-shirted sugar daddy: “Mick Wallace loves the vino

He wasn’t in I-Keano,
We sometimes play like Torino,
We are the Wexford Youths,
The players eat his Pasta,
It sometimes makes them fasta,
We wish it would make them pasta,
another Wexford Youth.
They try to say we’re boring,
Because we’re never scoring,
But we’ll keep on adoring,
The famous Wexford youths.

What do you think of our selection? Let us know the chant you would like to see added to the list through our comment facility below

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