'Blatter is apparently good at finding money' – the best lines from FIFA's €25m film flop 'United Passions'
The timing of Fifa's film 'United Passions' couldn't have been any worse with the revelations surrounding world football's governing body. It does however make the script all the more ironic.
The €28m film, 90pc of which was funded by Fifa, features Tim Roth, Gérard Depardieu, and Sam Neill, yet raked in just $607 (€538) in its opening weekend in the US.
The film has been criticised for skirting around corruption allegations which have dogged Fifa for decades, culminating over the last two weeks which has seen arrests following FBI and Swiss investigations and the resignation of president Sepp Blatter.
"Where's all the corruption in the script? Where is all the back-stabbing, the deals?," Roth is quoted as saying prior to the release, but the script has looked all the more comical following events over the last fortnight.
Here are some of the best lines from what The Guardian has described as "cinematic excrement".
Our accounts are disastrous
Fifa president Joao Havelange (Sam Neill) addresses an early board meeting to outline their financial difficulties.
An institution like ours cannot run on good intentions alone
Further indication that all was not as it appeared in world football's governing body.
Blatter is apparently good at finding money
Havelange seems taken by the financial expertise of his successor Sepp Blatter (Tim Roth).
You have everything you need to run our family...
Havelange sees traits in Blatter he feels will make him a worthy successor as the head of Fifa.
But you know, the slightest error and you are out
Havelnage still warns the incumbent that any mistakes will not be toleartad. History would have suggested a different story up until last week.
I don't know where the money is gone…I have my suspicions
A line Sepp Blatter is likely to use over the coming weeks and months.
The whole machine is going to blow up…and me with it
A prophetic statement from Blatter.
Watch the trailer below: