Top discipline tips for parents

Children's radars pick up the maybe in the no! State it assertively and decisively. Use yes rather than no. For example, "Yes, you can have it when your homework is finished."

BE POSITIVE

Direct attention away from what your child doesn't want to do, to what he does want to do. "As soon as you get out of the bath and brush your teeth, we can read a story."

EXPLAIN YOURSELF

This promotes the child's reasoning skills. "Hold the knife carefully, cutting away from you, or you'll cut yourself."

MAKE RULES IMPERSONAL

Make the conflict between the child and the rule instead of the child and you. Change "I don't want you to drink juice in the living room" to "The rule is: food and drink in the kitchen, please."

BE BRIEF AND CLEAR

When disciplining a child, it is not a time to give them a sermon on why you have come up with this philosophy on cleanliness or table manners.

OFFER A CHOICE WHENEVER POSSIBLE

"You need to have your room tidied up before bedtime. Do you want to do it now or after dinner?"

REWARD GOOD BEHAVIOUR

Give praise, prizes and hugs for being "caught" doing good. Ask the child for ideas. This is an excellent way to prove that you are interested and really listen.

KNOW WHEN NOT TO GET INVOLVED

This is different for each family, but often will include school issues and sibling issues. Let them work out a conflict at school or with a sibling without your help.

WORK TOGETHER

The effective parent does not say, "Get going" but rather "Let's go".

a) State the problem areas

b) Ask for solutions

c) Come up with a workable approach

PICK YOUR BATTLES

Adjusting expectations may increase cooperation.

a) Choose your issues. Ask yourself, 'Do I really want to set a limit? Is it important for the child's growth or just a preference to be negotiated?

b) Is this request age-appropriate? For example, is it reasonable to ask a six-year-old to stop asking questions?