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Michael O'Doherty: Precious Little isn't someone I'd bank on

In the home I call VIP Towers, we've come across some trouble-makers in the past 11 years, but I can honestly say that the end result has always been worth it, and we've never regretted dealing with a single person in all that time. Except, of course, for irritating, insufferable Mark Little.

The former Prime Time presenter's smug little head is back in the papers, as he strives to publicise the pet venture he left RTE for -- an online news 'service' called storyful.com.

And as a tie-in to publicise this crashingly dull distillation of world events, he has lent his name to an advertising campaign for online bank RaboDirect, in which customers are invited to log onto a blog which finds Mark sharing his wealth of wisdom about setting up a business during recessionary times.

"Risk brings hardship," goes his sermon. "You risk failure, but you know you would live to regret not having taken the risk."

And how does Mark deal with this hardship? Well, quite nicely, thank you very much, as in a separate newspaper interview last weekend, he admitted that he is living off his wife, who earns a very comfortable salary as a producer in RTE.

In conveniently forgetting that a lot of people who start up a business don't have this safety net to fall back upon, Mark rather diminishes his portrayal of himself as a fearless risk-taker, don't you think?

But voicing two contradictory opinions at the same time has always struck me as his forte. About 10 years ago, Mark featured in a photoshoot in VIP magazine, a project that he embraced at the time with open arms.

Three years later, he said the following in a newspaper interview. "Looking back, I did a stupid thing... I did a VIP magazine article. I'd been in the States for years and I had no concept of how venal this was in the eyes of so many people."

I guess part of Mark's problem was the wide audience that he was then reaching on RTE. He probably felt the need to suck up to VIP readers by doing a photoshoot, but when confronted by what he perceived as the cooler, edgier audience of a British Sunday newspaper, he tried to curry favour by slagging VIP off.

At least he'll have no such problems with his website because, let's be honest, he won't have an audience if his Rabo blog is anything to go by.

Since it was launched a week ago, guess how many people have flocked to comment on Mark's life-changing, inspiring words of wisdom? Four.

Madness

And given his penchant for U-turns, I fully expect Mark to go back on his mission statement of last week: "There was definitely a little madness in my decision, but it was the type of madness that you have to give in to, at least once." What's the betting that, in a year or two, Mark will be quoted as saying: "Looking back, I did a stupid thing... I started my own business in a recession..."?

In their advertisement, Mark Little is introduced by RaboDirect as "that fella off the telly". Sorry Mark, but to me you'll always be "that c**k off the box".

A perfect wedding ...then BOD spoiled it with his flip-flops

It was, as I wrote just a few days ago, an almost perfect weekend, as Brian and Amy tied the knot in a beautiful castle in Co Leitrim, and only for a brief time, the whole nation's mood was lifted.

And then, on Saturday morning, didn't BOD go and ruin it all...

I'm referring, of course, to 'flip-flop-gate'.

Posing for pictures the day after, wearing matching flip-flops may have seemed like a good idea; a bit of dressing down after the formality of the previous day, and certainly on Amy they served only to accentuate her natural beauty. But a heads-up for Brian -- jeans and flip-flops don't work. If you've just thrown on a pair of shorts, and are planning to dress properly later, then okay. But if you've gone to the trouble of putting on jeans, then go the extra distance, and put on some shoes.

In a perfect world, no man would ever wear in public what he wears in the confines of a dressing room. No speedos, no dressing gowns, no jockstraps. And certainly no flip-flops.

Here endeth the lesson. Consider it my wedding gift.

Just keep it in your pants, Tiger

JP McManus's Invitational Pro-Am golf tournament, taking place in Limerick all week, features a rogues' gallery of sex cheats the like of which has surely never been seen outside of The Meadows Sex Addiction Clinic in Arizona.

Seriously, whose idea was it to bring Michael Douglas, Hugh Grant and Tiger Woods together at the same event, and not expect us to guffaw at these men who put the 'cad' into caddie, and the fact that for once in their lives, they're looking to avoid a bit of rough?

While legendary swordsman Douglas, and vehicular relief-favouring Grant seemed to be enjoying themselves, it was left to serial philanderer Tiger Woods to throw a dampener on proceedings. Most nauseatingly, when quizzed about his mood by the media, he tried to garner sympathy by saying that two recent events -- the death of his father, and his personal troubles of the past six months -- had put his life into perspective, as though we should feel sorry for a run of bad luck he's had to endure. There's a subtle difference between the two things, Tiger. Fair enough, the death of your father was a tragic event you could do nothing about, but maybe if you'd just kept it in your pants once in a while, your private life wouldn't be in the mess its now in, and pesky reporters wouldn't be asking you embarrassing questions.


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