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It’s tough calling off your wedding, but if it doesn’t feel right then it’s not right

HE'S doing the right thing. Calling off a wedding when the invites have been sent out would be a tough thing for anyone to do. It must be way tougher when the western world is watching.

But if it doesn’t feel right it’s not right. All we can rely on is our gut instinct when it comes to marriage. And if your gut says “no”, it’s “no”.

I feel for him. Even at 35 when I woke up on that first morning 
with a wedding ring on, I wanted it off. I felt like an oyster with a 
bit of dirt in my shell. But like an oyster I made a nice pearl of it in the end.

The husband was the same age and has confessed to having had serious nerves four months before the wedding.

delivered

But they weren’t bad enough to stop him. And if they had been, he’d have had to stop, even if the invitations were signed, sealed and delivered.

A wedding is a day. A marriage is your whole life.

And Rory McIlroy is only 25. By Irish standards, he’s a kid. Kids nowadays develop a hell of a lot after they hit 25.

I couldn’t have made a commitment to anyone at 25. As for the men I went out with… One of them was asked to look after a friend’s goldfish over the summer holidays and he flushed it down the toilet.

His defence to the tearful young goldfish owner was: “I’m sure it’s thriving!”

Imagine I could be trying to raise a family with him now. On second thoughts, I couldn’t.

I might have the kids but we couldn’t have stayed together. And God help the kids living through our break-up and spending the rest of their lives picking up the pieces.

Of course some youngsters marry and have long and happy marriages, but the fact is that those who marry young have less chance of staying together.

Caroline Wozniacki may have made it plain that she is ready for marriage when she replied to a question last year about her marriage plans, but she’s only 23 years old and she may have some growing up to do yet.

The Danes get married just as late as the Irish, after all - we and the Nordics are the last to marry in Europe, not tying that first knot, on average, until we are 32.

McIlroy and Wozniacki already have the odds stacked against them when it comes to a life-long marriage because they have so much choice.

They are multi-millionaires and they are among the world’s greatest athletes.

They can have anyone they want and that makes it hard to settle.

It’s a shame McIlroy couldn’t have worked out he wasn’t ready for all that marriage “entails”,as he put it, before the wedding invitations were landing on hall mats for the hottest marriage of the year (after George and Amal).

VALUE

But when he says “there’s no good time to end a relationship”, he’s only half-right.

Now may not be good but it is better than later. Maybe McIlroy is making a strong statement about the value of marriage and refusing to go down the celebrity route of serial marriage.

Better to break a girl’s heart now than to break the heart of a wife later on. And way better to break a girl’s heart now than to break the hearts of kids later on.

I’m an Irish mammy and I wished he’d stayed with his Irish girlfriend of six years, Holly Sweeney, but when I see Paddy Power taking odds on them getting back together, I feel sick.

McIlroy had to go with his gut instinct when he broke up with Holly, and he had to go with his gut instinct breaking up with Caroline because when it comes to marriage, your gut is all you’ve got to guide you.


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