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Carol Hunt: I'll tell you why I don't like Mondays


Michelle Obama.

Michelle Obama.

Michelle Obama.

There's a list on the Internet of what successful people do on Monday mornings that marks them out as different from the rest of us sad mortals.

People like Madonna, Michelle Obama and Anna Wintour get up earlier, have everything they need in order and even manage to get a workout in.

Not me. I've had a stormy relationship with Monday mornings for as long as I can remember.

Throughout my life, they've been the time when I would make some mind-bogglingly embarrassing mistake (like leaving the house with Muppet slippers on) or have a dodgy accident.

But the events of last Monday beat everything. I was up at 5am because I was due in to the TV3 studies to chat about the days news stories.

Two cups of coffee and a text from the taxi driver saying he was outside the door and my eyes are still having trouble opening properly. Coat on, bag in hand I grab my trusty bottle of eye-drops and fling a few dollops into my right eye.

Except of course it isn't the eye-drops bottle, is it? No of course it isn't, it's nail glue.

Yes. Nail. Glue. And not just any old nail glue but the really tough stuff that can keep your fingers stuck together for an entire week.

For five minutes as I pour cold water over my now tightly glued together eye-lids, I wonder if I should tell the driver that instead of Ballymount we will be heading to hospital.


I force the eye open. Miraculously I peel a lump of glue off my eyeball with a fair few of my upper eyelashes and - praise the Lord - my eye's protected itself.

Then I leg it to the taxi and later mutter nonsense about getting something in my eye to the make-up girl at TV3. I go on telly. Nobody notices a thing.

Later, at home, I Google "eye drops" and "nail glue" and am astonished to find that I am not the first person to have tried to blind themselves with a toxic substance first thing in the morning.

It's not such a weird mistake because the bottles of both look identical. Honestly!

There are hundreds, probably thousands of us. It's oddly reassuring to know that I am not alone in my early morning disasters.

This, however, was a wake-up call (sorry) that I really need to get myself together in the mornings and concentrate on what I'm doing.

See, I have learned from my near eye-loss accident and am now a better person for the whole experience.

So, while I won't be planning to get up early for a Madonna-style workout any day soon, I will make sure I put "avoid glue" on my list of what successful people don't do, in preparation for avoiding any eye-watering disasters on a Monday morning.