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Yeti a must for these abominable times ...

WHAT have the Yeti and Dublin's own Mr Slow, Cllr Andrew Montague got in common?

Well both are abominable creatures, who on the rare occasions are seen publicly, spread fear and terror amongst their victims.

Except it's the targets of Mr Slow who have more to fear after the barmy bureaucrat enforced the 30kph speed zone throughout central Dublin.

If only he were more Skoda Yeti, than Gruffalo.

The Gruffalo, for those who haven't little 'uns, is a mythical beast whom even the thought of his existence was enough to scare the be-Jaysus out of all those who dwelled in the jungle.

However, when push came to shove, the Gruffalo couldn't even out-muscle a tiny little mouse.

His newfound failure resulted in him scurrying back to his cave where he remained scared and terrified, his reputation forever broken.

Now don't get me wrong - as far I know Andrew Montague doesn't have "knobbly knees, turned out toes, and a poisonous wart at the end of his nose" like the Gruffalo.

But Mr Slow does have features far uglier for Dublin drivers ... a perceived contempt for motorists that has resulted in the most archaic laws, whereby cars are now forced to go at impossibly slow speeds through town.

These days Mr Slow and his bicycle-clip wearing cohorts are feeling rather pleased with their bylaws still intact throughout our now paralysed city centre.

But my guess is that if by the summer these overpaid mandarins at city hall will see their recently enforced laws over-turned.

Soon it won't be long before Mr Slow (Labour) and his Green Party buddies will be chucked out of their tree-hugging utopia at City Hall, and into the path of a 67a.

It's only then will they realise that they are living in a city, where traffic and cars are an essential lifeblood.

The sooner these luddites, log-dwelling dreamers realise this, the better for all of us.

And I think I've found the perfect car to coax these cavemen out of the woods, and onto the roads.

And the perfect car for these people is the Skoda Yeti.

Not to sully the poor Yeti, by turning it into a start-up car for socialists, but it is a gem of a machine for those with wholesome tastes.

It is hugely comfortable, almost jeep-like in its poise, highly efficient and a fantastic little performer despite its mere 1.2litre engine capacity.

It comes with delicious 17" alloys, cruise control and a yummy 3 spoke leather steering wheel.

The Yeti has tonnes of techie extras including, Bluetooth, parking assist and multi-media functions.

I know the people at Skoda are probably blue in the face with congratulatory editorials telling them just how far they've come from the bad old days.

Yes, we are all aware of how good a marketing campaign (at considerable expense) it has achieved at changing public perceptions of their product -that and a decent engine compliments of VW go a long way. But the truth is, Skoda are now quality cars, filled with lots of gadgets and extras that make motoring all worthwhile.

The Skoda Yeti is one of the best small family cars I've driven and will cost you from €19,910 to around €25,220.