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I want new runners... and all hell is let loose

There's just over three weeks to go and part of me feels I need more time to train. I need to build up my stamina. Part of me is utterly fed up of that constant niggling anticipation and I'm almost wishing the time away. I'm getting my performance anxiety far too early.

Another thing is that my runners are starting to get a bit tatty and worn. But honestly, bring it up in a conversation and it's like unleashing the gates of hell. Friends are adamant that under no circumstances should I change my running shoes at this stage. They make it sound as if Santa, the tooth fairy and the Easter bunny will all disown me if I dare to change my shoes so close to the race.

It's at this stage that I need to change my training route – for the sanity of those who live along the route. You see, when I'm out on my own, with my headphones on, I've a terrible habit of singing along with the songs.

I initially mistook people's glances to mean that I looked like I was getting a nice pace on. Now I recognise it as a look that says "does she not know that we can hear her squawking?"

Maybe Phillip Schofield would lend me his cube and I could exercise in a sound-proof box. Problem solved!


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