Model Nadia Forde has opened up for the first time since her mother's death last month.
The aspiring singer (26) was by her mum Berenice Paolozzi's side when she died of from cancer in June and she said she has been dealing with the grief of losing her mum "day by day".
Although she was estranged from her mother before learning about her cancer, Nadia said the pair grew close in Berenice's final days.
"It's obviously a difficult thing for me to talk about, it's something that I'm dealing with every single day and it's just day by day. Different days, different hours, different feelings," she said.
PRECIOUS
"I'm lucky enough that I was aware of what was happening so I had precious time that I'll never get back again and I made a conscious decision to come home a few months ago and live in the hospice."
The I'm A Celebrity star and her younger brother Steven were raised by their grandmother Bernie after their parents split up.
Nadia didn't speak with her mother until last year and admitted that getting to know her before her death was a "blessing".
"Families are so different and everyone's families have different dynamics. My mum was human and was going through stuff that I think caused other family members to step in and say 'We need to take care of the kids'," Nadia explained.
"It wasn't conventional. There was a long period of time where we didn't see each other and didn't know each other and I think the one blessing about her illness was it gave me a chance to have a relationship with her."
The Clontarf native, who previously described her relationship with her mother as "difficult", said she and Berenice put their differences behind them as her cancer got worse.
"When you're dealing with someone that's at the end of their life, it's not really about you or how you feel, you're just so consumed in being there for them and this scary thing they're about to face," she said.
"You just want to be by her side, you just don't want to leave them."
Days after Berenice's death, the 26-year-old flew to Spain to see her best friend Debbie O'Leary wed former Ireland and Munster rugby star Peter Stringer.
DECISION
Speaking about the decision, Nadia said it was her family that told her to go.
"I was there when Debbie picked her dress and it kind of felt like how am I not going to be there for her. This is someone who is like my sister," she said. "It was with my family's blessing and I didn't know if I was going to go or not, but they told me to."
Speaking on Saturday Night With Miriam, the reality star also revealed how Debbie and Peter introduced her to her rugby star boyfriend Dominic Day.
"I actually met him through Peter and Debbie. He plays with Peter in Bath and I think they've always wanted to hook me up," Nadia said.
"He's great, he's very supportive and Debbie and Peter were working on it for a while.
"Debbie had actually said it to me a year ago and I was not in that place. They're delighted, they're loving that they've played matchmaker."