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Thanks a bunch, Gisele. Way to make us feel bad

SOME women make a career out of making the rest of us feel bad. Brazilian supermodel Gisele Bundchen has been giving it her best shot for some years now.

Supernaturally gorgeous face, legs up to her armpits and a beach babe complexion that constantly reminds us that she's Rio de Janeiro to our Rush. As if it wasn't enough to have the body from Venus, she had the boyfriend from Hollywood. Leonardo di Caprio was every schoolgirl's dream in the wake of Titanic -- and Gisele landed him.

When that ended, we thought: Will heart-broken Gisele finally get in step with the rest of us and have a dodgy rebound fling with the next bloke she meets in a bar? Fat chance.

She married handsome, rich, American football quarterback Tom Brady.

Then something happened that we thought couldn't fail to bring Gisele into the realm of normal womanhood: she fell pregnant. We would be lying if we said we didn't ponder what this life-changing experience would mean for the world's most beautiful woman. Oh, alright. We wondered if she would get fat.

The possibilities were endless -- a bit of bloating, a hint of cellulite, stretchmarks, spots? Not all women glow during pregnancy: would it be too much to ask that Gisele reach out to her sisters and show that she, too, was human? Of course it was. Gisele -- now mother to baby boy Benjamin -- told interviewers how she didn't even need to buy maternity clothes. "I kept using almost the same clothes, with small adjustments on the stomach," said the woman who was photographed wearing skinny jeans right through her final trimester. It would be comforting to think the lack of baby weight was just another part of Gisele's freakish good luck in the gene pool lottery. But she couldn't let it be. "I kept myself in good shape during the whole pregnancy, eating healthily, meditating, and doing exercises," she said. She did kung fu until November (she gave birth at the start of December) and was back at work, on a photoshoot, six weeks after the birth. It's not a crime to look after yourself but, frankly, this just sounds like boasting. There is one great levelling experience, however, that no pregnant woman can avoid: childbirth. (Gisele wanted to give birth at home, in the bath, with no drugs.) No pain relief -- that must have hurt, right?

Er, no. "It didn't hurt in the slightest," the supermum told Brazilian TV. "It wasn't like, 'This is so painful'. So I transformed that intense feeling into a hope of seeing him." Just like giving a delicate little burp and popping out an angel.

We're happy for her. No, really.


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