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Lost in translation

What he says and what he means

Says: “Great to meet you.”

Means: “I didn’t love meeting you and probably won’t be calling.”

Says: “I’m not over my ex, so we have to take it slowly.”

Means: “I am going to play the ‘get out of jail free’ card so that you are forever afraid of hassling me into a relationship.”

Says: “I’m out with mates. Meet later on?”

Means: “I don’t see you as girlfriend material. If I did, you’d be coming with me, or we’d be spending the whole evening together.”

Says: (Blushing) “I’ve bought you a toothbrush for when you stay over at mine.”

Means: “I know that you interpret this as a major gesture, so I don’t have to make much effort for a while now. Oh, and you’re going to fall for me even more, which is all part of the plan.”

Says: “I love you.”

Means: “I think I love you.”