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'Dogger' Stan nips at heels of 'smug' BBC

STAN COLLYMORE never struck us as a particularly likeable sort during his meandering soccer career across the pond, and that's without even venturing into his dark-side 'dogging' past or that infamous 'Ulrika moment'. Still, we've got to admit a belated admiration for Stan the man this week.

Why? Because of his witheringly dismissive demolition of BBC Sport's greatest institution, Match of the Day.

Collymore was previously fired as a radio pundit by the Beeb, who apparently weren't best amused by the aforementioned 'dogging' revelation (obviously sex with strangers is okay so long as car parks aren't involved).

While insisting that he is "not bitter at all" towards the BBC, Stan's Twitter attack shows a killer instinct that wasn't always apparent during his own playing days.

"I love public service broadcasting and our national broadcaster but the truth is that in my opinion MOTD is stale, cliched, smug pap a lot of the time," he surmises. "It's a lazy show that doesn't provoke debate in our game and just says, 'We've been there and done it and we don't have to do anything but sit here and dole out cliches'."

Stan goes on to post some helpful suggestions that could shake up the programme's analysis and editorial content.

Doubtless, Mr Lineker won't be overly pleased to learn he should be switched from anchor to lead pundit, aided by a revolving team of opinionated and passionate ex-players. Messrs Hansen and Shearer may be even more alarmed to discover Stan would "get rid" of them, with Shearer dispatched to 5 Live instead.

Guess what? He's right: Curve Ball has long since concluded that while ITV remains the champion of 'Dumb and Dumber' football analysis, Match of the Day has become something almost worse ... Smug and Smugger.