Saturday 17 February 2018

Dial M for murder in mobile madness

• Recently, I dreamt that the Government had declared an amnesty on mobile phones. We were invited to hand them in to the nearest garda station with the assurance that no action would be taken against us. I felt a great burden was about to be lifted from my life. Alas, it was but a dream.

The plague of the mobile persists as if it has a life of its own; driven by exceptional reproductive competence, everybody seems to have one. If this is an essential feature of the evolutionary drive, my extinction is imminent.

Though I don't believe in the traditional concept of hell, I regularly experience the earthly equivalent on my morning train where I am invariably confronted by a gaggle of travellers providing the redundant information to their partners that they are on the train. These calls seem to have their provenance in the guilt that arises from abandoning loved ones to the chores of domesticity.

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