Journalists

Um, can someone tell me what year it is? 

One of the unfortunate but rather unavoidable consequences of growing older is that you often look around and think to yourself - the world is going mad, it's full of crazy people and things used to be much more sensible.

Don't worry - our seven-year itch will soon be scratched 

Okay, take a deep breath, gird your loins and just keep on trucking - only six more days to go.

We need to stop caring so much about so many trivial things 

Last Sunday provided perhaps the biggest TV event of the year so far - controversial, divisive, eagerly-awaited and eagerly-condemned in equal measure.

#MeToo is going the way of all other revolutionary movements 

Well, happy birthday to #MeToo, you've come a long way in your first year.

Thirty years since Rushdie's verses and we've learned nothing 

For a variety of coincidental reasons, 2018 has been very much the year of remembering times past.

Ian O'Doherty: 'Vegan hate mob are latest to play the victim card' 

One of the more baffling elements of modern society has been the way we're all told that we're victims.

Ian O'Doherty: 'The poppy - a symbol of fascism or just respect for the fallen?' 

Every now and then a story comes along which is so odd, and just so... ignorant that you have to check to make sure someone isn't pulling your leg.

Ian O'Doherty: Peter Casey's strength was the main parties' weakness - now he wants to take it all the way to the Dáil 

THIS time last week, Peter Casey was propping up the presidential polls and hovering between 1pc and 2pc.

Halloween traditions have changed - regrettably 

For many of us growing up in the 1980s, Halloween was, as they say, a more innocent time.

Ian O'Doherty: In this ramshackle election, he who shall come last shall be... grabbing all the headlines 

One of the most common gripes heard from Irish politicians is their despair at the cynicism of the average voter.

Winter is nearly upon us - we may as well try to embrace it 

Well, that's that.

UK cops guilty of some truly criminal stupidity 

There is a very handy rule of thumb which suggests that if you give someone power they haven't earned, they will always, always abuse it.

Capitalism let us down - do you think the alternative is better? 

Doesn't a decade fly when you're having fun?

Ian O'Doherty: Law that bans filming of on-duty gardaí will never happen – but it's worrying a justice minister should even allow idea to be put forward' 

THEY were scenes which seemed to belong in the Ukraine or Crimea.

The best response to anarchists? Why, mockery, of course 

It's fairly obvious at this stage that we're living through a time of unprecedented tumult - some of that is good. Much of it is very, very bad. What's worse, much of it is incredibly stupid.

Comment: There's no excuse for anyone to contract measles these days - rise is down to fear, ignorance and arrogance 

There are some things which we have happily consigned to the dust bin of history.

A bygone era when the Pope came to town 

What a difference, um, 39 years makes, eh?

The best fairy tales are truly terrifying 

I can never figure out whether overprotective parents are that way inclined because they're genuinely worried for their brood, or because they are weak themselves. The problem with weak people is that they have an unfortunate habit of creating weak children, and thus the new generation of weaklings comes along and repeats the cycle.

Television: Marching on with Miriam... and the rise of President Rock? 

It has already been dismissed in some circles as Northern Ireland For Dummies, but the Miriam O'Callaghan-presented The Long March (RTÉ One, Tuesday), which charted the emergence of the Northern Irish Civil Rights movement was always on a hiding to nothing.

I don't think I'll ever be past my Prine 

There's something tremendously depressing about getting older.

Boris puts his foot in it - not for the first time 

Whoops, he just did it again. Again.

If you look to be offended, you'll find something 

Isn't it odd how some people are only popular when they're victims?

Miggledy is right - betting apps are a bloody scourge 

If I'm perfectly honest, I don't have a lot of time for our President's brand of politics.

Adjustment Day by Chuck Palahniuk - Dystopian satire with a stark warning for US 

The 'Fight Club' author returns to form with this novel about an America fractured along the lines of identity politics

Rural life is fine - but I miss the noise of the city 

I went down to the west of Ireland last week for a variety of reasons, but most of them involved the wife telling me that I had to.

Silly season is turning us all into Mary Whitehouse 

When I was a teenager, I had a bit of an obsession with Mary Whitehouse and her campaign group, the National Viewers' and Listeners' Association.

Trump better have an appetite for humble pie 

How does the old saying go again: the more things change, the more they stay the same?

In an age of madness, common sense is a radical position 

Did you ever think you would see the day when nearly 10,000 Irish people would turn up at a concert venue just to look at a bunch of 'racists, bigots and Nazis' expound their toxic world view?

Against all expectation, this has been a truly brilliant World Cup 

Well, it wasn't supposed to end like that, was it?

Wolf-whistling a hate crime? I've heard it all 

I must admit, I'm obviously not very good at being a traditional bloke.

If you're offended by 'Love Island', you need help 

It's a sad day indeed when you have to use a reality TV show to point out the absurdities of modern life. It's an even sadder day when the people watching the show are actually more awful than the contestants.

Why are people surprised that the Church is conservative? 

'All it takes for evil to flourish is for good men to do nothing."

On your bike, cycling cranks... 

We've always been a cranky sort of people, happy to play the poor mouth and claim victimhood whenever something doesn't go our way.

The World Cup is on - time to eat ribs and watch three games a day 

I've never been one for remembering dates or anniversaries.

Rewriting history - Bill Clinton's literary collaboration 

Bill Clinton has teamed up with one of the world's biggest-selling authors and created a strangley dated and far-fetched Washington romp.

Moz picks the wrong martyr in Robinson 

Oh dear, he's at it again.

Forget means testing - just stop allowance after second child 

Steady there, Regina - stand back and take your fingers away from the socket.

The world burns while the courts obsess on Trump tweets 

There are times when it's hard to escape the impression that the universe is deliberately screwing with us.

Ian O'Doherty: All hail the House of Markle - America has a new biracial queen 

Everyone loves a good royal wedding - even those who say they hate them.

Pop stars should never apologise 

They sure don't make pop stars like they used to.

Logic leaves the building as the Middle East burns 

If there's one thing politicians hate and fear more than anything else, it's the dreaded law of unintended consequences.

Wasting time on a victimless crime 

What goes on behind between consenting adults is their own business, is it not?

Ian O'Doherty: After abortion, euthanasia will be our next burning social issue 

For obvious reasons, the last few weeks have seen various words and phrases tossed around with gay abandon.

History to become a thing of the past? 

One of the great shibboleths of our time is that we are living in an era of fake news. Fake news, along with fake outrage designed to elicit fake apologies, is now the order of the day.

Official Ireland is now officially bad for your health 

'You can gaze out the window, get mad and get and get madder/ Throw your hands in the air in and say what does it matter?"

Object to litter? You right-wing monster! 

We're constantly bombarded with hectoring calls to do more to protect the environment, but most of these suggestions simply involve gesture politics - like turning off the lights for an hour during Earth Day. It won't make nay difference to the planet, but you'll feel all nice and virtuous and can tell people that you're doing your bit.

Latest smoking proposals are about control, not health 

There used to be a well-worn phrase that all political careers end in failure. But not in Ireland, oh no.

Where would we be without the United Nations? 

Well, the big day is nearly upon us. Are you excited? I am.

Ian O'Doherty: Later working hours for night owls? Let me sleep on it 

Well, that's it, I'm toast. Kaput. Finito. I could keel over at any moment. And if you're part of the estimated 15pc of the Irish population who suffers from insomnia, you're in trouble as well. So you better pay attention, because this article could save your life.

An outbreak of measles? What year is it? 

Did you get vaccinated against the flu? Did you know that if you did get the jab, you were more likely to contract the far more deadly Aussie flu, while those who didn't bother getting the vaccination only succumbed to the more common or garden variety?

Driverless cars put us on the road to ruin 

Well, it was nice while it lasted. I am, of course, talking about the Anthropocene Period, when humans ruled the roost.

Ian O'Doherty: Consent may be sexy but surely enthusiasm is sexier? 

If we have learned one thing from the fallout from the Belfast rape trial - and that's a rather large 'if' - then it must surely be that the sexes still struggle to communicate with each other.

Does Roseanne signal a backlash against the Never-Trumps? 

During the early to mid 1990s, when the internet was still seen as a new fangled gizmo that would never catch on, and mobile phones were the size of a phone book, there was one show which ruled the TV landscape.

Down with that sort of dodgy dog 

No society can function when free expression is no longer valued. That's why comedians are so important.

A method to Unabomber's madness 

I finished watching The Unabomber on Netflix the other night and it was probably the best piece of TV I've seen so far this year.

Shane Ross reminds us that the working classes don't matter 

There are many ways in which ordinarily smart people can appear to completely lose their marbles.

Maybe it's time to cut St Patrick's Day some slack? 

Well, here we go again.

New smoking ban in mental health units is just cruel 

Well, they're at it again. Chipping away, sneering, demeaning and wallowing in their own misplaced sense of moral superiority, the anti-smoking zealots are once more on the march.

UK courts make martyrs out of morons 

Of all the stupid, needless, infuriating things that Donald Trump has done since he took office - and there have been a few - retweeting some fake videos by the Britain First group stands out.

Ian O'Doherty: Looters are scumbags – to say anything else is an insult to their honest neighbours 

IN Amish culture, there is a tradition known as “rumspringa.”

'Ray of Light': 20 years and still brilliant 

Bear with me on the nostalgia trip, but bad weather tends to bring that out in the best of us. And even the rest of us.

Enjoy the snow - it'll be gone soon enough 

Here we go again.

Crisis actors are the latest move in America's danse macabre 

So, another week, another mass shooting in America.

First they came for... our toilets? 

The news that UCD is to redesignate 170 toilets on campus as 'gender neutral' has been greeted with widespread apathy and a shrug of the shoulders, which is surely a good thing.

Playing Top Trumps with North Korea 

Are you one of those people staying up late to watch the Winter Olympics? Nope, me neither. My interest is directly proportionate to the danger the athletes face. So I have a bit of an interest in, say, the luge, where someone might die in a spectacular way, and zero interest in, say, the ice skating.

Forget the small differences - #MeToo is right on FGM 

Since it first appeared in the dim and distant days of, oh, about six months ago, the #MeToo movement has become the most successful social media campaign of all time.

Ian O'Doherty: Paedophile hunters say they are trying to do the right thing...but every mob thinks that 

Throughout human history, every society has had its own moral panic.

25 years later, Venables still haunts the psyche 

In the Information Age, any crime can shock the world. Whether it's a celebrity having some jewellery stolen from their hotel or footage of someone being bullied in a small American town, the proliferation of social media ensures that anything can go viral at any time.

Thanks for all the laughs, Martin 

So farewell, then, John Mahoney, and thanks for all the laughs.

A year in, and Trump is finally maturing. Unlike his critics 

Well, that was an unexpected 12 months.

O'Neill's grudge against RTÉ man is baffling and pointless 

There used to be a rather popular old saying which claimed that indifference is the best form of contempt.

We're far from a perfect society, but don't compare it to the 1980s 

It's often said that the past is another country, and when it comes to this place in the 1980s, that country may as well have been Albania.

Which witch is which in #MeToo land? 

First the outrage, then the backlash.

Ian O'Doherty: There will be better books on Trump's regime than Fire and Fury but none will have its impact 

There'll be better books on Donald Trump's regime, but none will have the impact of Michael Wolff's breathless and riotously scurrilous account.

If we insist on a president, we must be able to vote for one 

Ah, the will he/won't he debate.

People have the right to be wrong 

Have you ever spoken to a Holocaust denier? If you ever get such an opportunity, I highly recommend it.

So, have you broken all your New Year's resolutions yet? 

Okay, let's do a quick check list to see where we stand, shall we?

Politics? Just enjoy best of Trump comedy 

I've always believed that politics is too important to take seriously. In other words, it's best to take a sideways view of things because if you were to look it straight in the eye, you'd completely lose your mind.

Ian O'Doherty: The referendum will be bitter. But we need to lance this boil 

Are we nearly there, yet? Are we nearly there, yet?

Ian O'Doherty: We sell a myth to the Americans then cry when they buy it 

It was 'outrageous'. It was 'disgusting'. It was 'racism'.

Silent Taylor earns herself Swift rebuke 

Well, it's been a tough week for wealthy, blonde, white women. And that's not a phrase you write every day.

We are the architects of evil, not some Devil or demonic spirit 

What is evil? Is it an act? Is it a state of mind? Can someone commit an evil act and still be deemed a decent person, or are they consumed by powers beyond their control which merely makes them agents of evil?

Britain First are disgusting - and really stupid 

I was once accosted by a group of self-professed anarchists who started shrieking 'no speech for fascists' every time I opened my mouth.

We need to remember that mob justice is no justice at all 

Monday, August 28, 2000 is a date which will live in stupidity.

We know we're not Barcelona but we're not that bad, either 

It wasn't supposed to end like that.

Is grandma bad for your health? 

It should always be remembered that a large proportion of academics are entirely mad.

It's that time of the year again - all aboard the poppy-go-round! 

It has been rather interesting, even amusing, to observe the hysterical reactions from the usual circles to the sight of Leo Varadkar wearing the 'shamrock poppy' in the Dáil earlier this week.

Who will save us from ourselves? 

Ah, you know the feeling - you're doing your shopping, picking up some basic provisions and before you know it you've spent all your money on booze. You didn't intend to buy all those bottles of wine and you have no idea why you have two slabs of cheap beer in the back of your car. All you wanted was to get a few things for dinner but there in front of you, impervious to your resistance, was the booze aisle and when we see booze, we just have to buy it, don't we?

Disgust at Humphries doesn't mean you're part of the mob 

I was once asked by a wise man: what is most important - justice or mercy?

Aki a fine player but shouldn't wear the green 

What does it mean to be Irish? It's a question which has been asked a lot in the wake of the Halawa case, while forgetting the only legal fact that counts - he is an Irish citizen, and entitled to exactly the kind of consular assistance available to any other Irish citizen, regardless of where their parents come from. You can have as many doubts about the many holes in his story as you like, but the law is the law.

Ian O'Doherty: 'A moderately sprightly zombie moves at a quicker clip than many recent episodes of The Walking Dead' 

It’s returning for its eighth season, tonight marks its 100th episode, it features one of the best screen bad guys this side of Ramsay Bolton and people have loved the show for years.

We stress about Scientology but give other faiths a free pass 

To the non-religious mind, all forms of faith are vaguely absurd.

Spare us the Hollywood hypocrisy 

As the Harvey Weinstein story grows more horrible and weird by the day, we're witnessing the collapse of the Hollywood hierarchy.

Sean Hughes 1965-2017: Hughes was true trailblazer who paved the way for Irish comedians 

While the country may have been understandably preoccupied with Hurricane Ophelia yesterday, the news that Sean Hughes has died at the age of 51 came as a shocking blow to Irish comedy fans.

Well, ain't that a nice can of worms? 

When the news broke that infamous movie mogul Harvey Weinstein was a serial predator, my only surprise was that people were surprised.

Ian O'Doherty: 'Forget hygge, here's the new happiness craze' 

Forget hygge, we're now on a lykke bandwagon.

Think Blazing Saddles would be made today? Think again... 

Think you know your comedy?

When do we lose the right to choose? 

Arguably the greatest stain on America's conscience, the death penalty is an obscenity that has no place in a civilised society. Apart from the obvious horror of executing an innocent person, the state-sanctioned murder of even a genuinely guilty individual reduces the people - in whose name the act is committed - to the same moral level as the criminal. In other words, it is a declaration that the state's moral bottom line is no better than a killer's.

Pay attention, Ireland - because we're being Nannied to death... 

First they came for our Christmas ads and we said nothing. Well, not quite. First they came for our Christmas ads and the nation, as one, rolled their eyes to heaven and had a grim laugh as yet another bunch of unelected, unrepresentative, State-funded busybodies decided to justify their existence by going after Christmas commercials.

Ireland is not Gilead, no matter what the pro-choice brigade say 

In a time of unprecedented strife and rancour, where people seem further apart than any time in recent memory, the one thing we really need is... an abortion referendum.

North Korea really isn't a lovely place 

Most young journalists - one would hope, anyway - will be familiar with the name Walter Duranty.

'Nazi' baker row really takes the biscuit... 

Another day, another scandal.

Ian O'Doherty: Forget the gender pay gap - it's the class divide that should worry us all 

Sometimes it's hard to be a woman - apparently.

All this talk about anxiety is making me nervous 

I was watching Sky News the other afternoon - how I came to have an afternoon free to watch the telly is another matter entirely - and a woman from an organisation called Anxiety UK was being interviewed.

Hillary Clinton - the politician who didn't know when to leave the party 

For most people, growing up means learning new things and remembering old lessons.