I found an old lotto ticket in my bag I hadn't checked when I was out on my essential-items-only shop during the week.
Handing it over, it occurred to me this would be a terrible time to win the lottery. Not because you wouldn't welcome the money but what would you do with it?
Whenever we dream of that ching-ching life-changing moment the first thing you imagine you'd do is book an exotic holiday somewhere, anywhere, flying first class the whole way, possibly handing in your notice at work at the same time. Of course, you'd need a new car - top of the range obviously and possibly somewhere fab to live if the win was big enough.
At the very least you'd treat your entire family and friends to a slap-up party with buckets of champagne on ice. But we can't do any of those things at the moment, even if we wanted.
What a damp squib! Everything would be on hold until things were back to normal.
I finally got to the top of the socially distanced queue. I mentioned all this to the shop assistant. It's worse than that, he told me. You couldn't even travel into the lotto offices to get the cheque!
None of my musings mattered. Not a winning ticket. Just as well.
Nothing like a crisis for Covidiots to go viral
Where there's a crisis, there's a conspiracy theory.
The tinfoil hat wearers coop themselves up in their attics more than the rest of us at the best of times so many oddballs now believe their time has finally come. Not content with an actual viral pandemic being bad enough, they're busy trying to convince the rest of us it was caused deliberately.
Whether Covid-19 is the result of 5G phone masts or a foreign government using a biological weapon to subdue the planet for takeover, there's no suppressing some people's imaginations.
A great deal of time and effort of serious people who have otherwise better things to be doing - scientists, doctors and politicians - is therefore wasted denying the silliness, pulled between the fine line of giving it air and popping the bubble.
The attempted destruction of two phone masts in Donegal (4G as it happens, but … facts, eh?) was not only stupid but dangerous. The Covidiots tried to light the masts with coal, of all things, in a misguided attempt to rail against the virus which can only be transmitted from person to person via droplets.
Facts don't appear to matter a whit to some people who seem able to read with great intensity whatever dirge and nonsense pops up on their Facebook page, but can't comprehend the simple English in a wealth of data from reliable sources.
I need a rest from this hectic online social life
The whole social connection arrangements are getting faintly ridiculous now.
"I've a virtual drinks thing with the lads in the kitchen," says himself on Friday.
"Grand," says I, "I've my e-bookclub on Zoom so I'll take my wine and the laptop upstairs; see you after?"
"Well I've a pub quiz thing after, without the pub, obviously," he added. "Might do that one in the sitting room for the change of scenery."
The third member of the household had an online meet-up with pals in her bedroom. The Facetime organised with the other children then clashed with the daily video call to their granny.
Honestly, it's exhausting trying to keep up. I'm already looking forward to the lifting of restrictions so we can have a rest from our social lives.