Generation X - why do we never hear anything about us? Like an awkward, middle child squashed between the conservative, greedy Boomers and the whining, entitled Millennials - who divvy up all the attention between them.
The X generation just plods along in the squeezed middle without the cash of the generation above us and without the cool of the one below.
We had a brief moment in the sun when The Divine Comedy sort of wrote a song about us. But even then we had no clear-cut, defining features like a feckless love of lattes and avocados or a rapacious accumulation of wealth. We were just a bit seedy and hypocritical. And apart from that - no one ever really noticed us at all.
Which kind of makes sense. We were brought up in a time before adults ceded any power to children. Not for us was there any say in what we watched on the one TV - no one cared if we found The World at War boring.
Not for us was there a possibility of casual demands for takeaway pizza on a Friday night being met with anything other than derision and a Findus crispy pancake on a plate being plonked in front of us.
But we also came along after a time of huge social upheaval. Growing up, we thought World War II was ancient history but it only ended 25 or 30 years before we were born. The adults that came before us had a rigid conservatism fuelled in that fire that made them much tougher than us - disinterested in political correctness or liberalism - they were simply in charge. We needed to accept that.
Which is why we are the perfect generation to excel during this pandemic. We were raised for exactly this moment. Lockdown life mirrors almost perfectly our youth.
We grew up in a time where it was perfectly normal for there to be nothing to do and nowhere to go. Morrissey singing Everyday Is Like Sunday nowadays seems like a song about the ennui of a tortured young man.
But no, he was just singing about the 1980s. There really was nothing to do. All the bands back then sang songs about chronic boredom.
It was heady! More a miserable than a misspent youth.
We had no money. We literally wore our parents' old clothes. Vintage back then was by necessity as much as by design. There were no shopping centres to hang around.
There was no accessible high street fashion - just a solitary shop in any given town with a questionable woman's name above the door and a lot of silky blouses and unsettling slacks inside. I once wore three artfully placed snoods on a night out. People admired my outfit. (No doubt for its innovation and surprising ability to stay on, as much as for its style).
And there genuinely was nowhere to go. My local town of Greystones now has a main street that is wall-to-wall cafes. 'Barista' is the most common occupation on the census here.
The village smells of coffee, cheese and The Happy Pear. We are starting to make Dalkey nervous about its previously unassailable status of most luvvies per square mile of any town in Ireland.
But it was not always ever thus. When we were growing up, instant coffee was sophisticated. There was only one local coffee shop - oddly, it mainly sold sausages - and I'd say I could count on my fingers the number of times I darkened its doors. Instead of going to meet our friends at some kind of a venue, we just hung around.
This consisted of meeting your pals on the road - because your mother wouldn't let loads of you into the house at once - and loitering with intent, in the hope that you might meet some other gang also hanging around and maybe flirt with them, while wearing your dad's cardigan.
It was a trying time. We were grossly under-stimulated and had in the main low expectations of ourselves and of life in general - which was great really, as we were rarely ever disappointed.
The Boomers now are sadly having a rough time of it. Many of them are cocooning and wary of lockdown being lifted. They are living with an unenviable anxiety that makes this a fairly rotten experience for them.
The Millennials, as we all know, are made of snow and spend most of their time trying to get people to talk about identity politics and commiserate with them about their unduly high stress levels and lack of prospects. We alone - Generation X - are uniquely positioned to thrive under these current conditions. We are unfazed by endless unimaginative, home-cooked dinners. We are well used to a time when TV was the only form of entertainment - in fact Netflix, on-demand TV and smart phones are more than our simple minds can really deal with.
We know what it is to be powerless in the face of days of nothingness stretching out before us without end.
We learnt to live with crippling boredom from our earliest memories. Unemployment. Being broke. Going nowhere. These are part of our DNA.
So I say to you, Generation X, this is our time. This is what we have trained for. Less frail than Baby Boomers. More boring and resilient than Millennials.
We've got this. We know lockdown life. We've lived it before. This is a second youth for us.
This is our moment.
*Puts Nothing Ever Happens by Del Amitri on my Walkman and feels pretty smug.