Friday 23 February 2018

Kevin Myers: Relax, my apolitical friends, this is an election-free zone

Kevin Myers

Today is the first day in which this column establishes a sanctuary for readers away from the G*****l E******n. This is the columnar equivalent of Ireland's first nudist beach, but as well as insisting on bared pubic regions and untethered mammaries, we are GE-free.

Off-duty gardai patrol these column-inches, to ensure that no GE agents wriggle in amongst the naked sunbathers, trying to sell them bikinis or thongs. Sticky things, thongs; and we don't allow any Stickies here.

Ah, we have our first guests of the day approaching the beach. And it is Senor Silvio Berlusconi, a radiant example of the mortician's art.

Please sign in or register with Independent.ie for free access to Opinions.

Sign In

Promoted Links

Today's news headlines, directly to your inbox every morning.

Don't Miss