Friday 15 November 2019

We should all have such problems

Kudos to former male model Otis Duffy, who has finally struck a blow for men everywhere.

In a $3m lawsuit filed in Manhattan Supreme Court yesterday, poor ickle Otis said his career at a hair replacement salon was effectively ended when he complained about a female colleague "who rubbed her breasts in my face" as well another female colleague "who repeatedly propositioned me".

Duffy claims that it's not his fault he's a complete hottie and submitted that: "If I wanted breasts rubbed in my face I would go to a strip club."

People have slagged him for being a bit of a wuss, but ISpy knows only too well the scourge of sexual harassment in the workplace.

Although in our case it's the opposite problem to Duffy's -- no matter how often we have informed the females of the Indo newsroom that they can sexually harass ISpy as much as they want, not one of them has taken up the offer.

Low-cut tops, tight jeans, a sexy little walk -- we've tried all these tactics and the only response was an email from Human Resources telling us to cut it out.

Bah.

IT'S OFFENSIVE TO THE USELESS

The way employment law has gone these days, it's virtually impossible to sack someone, which would explain why ISpy still appears.

But ask anyone who has ever conducted job interviews and they will tell you that they have become a bloody legal minefield.

You can't even ask chicks if they plan on getting pregnant in case they sue you, and the whole thing is slanted towards the lazy, the stupid and the litigious.

And now they have taken things a step further in Britain, where employers are not even allowed to stipulate that the applicant for a position must speak English because that is seen as racist.

In a new development, job centres are refusing to accept ads which look for a 'reliable' worker.

The reason? It could be seen as discriminatory to unreliable people.

Nicole Mamo, who runs a recruitment agency in Norfolk, was told that she couldn't look for 'reliable and hard working people' because the wording was "offensive and discriminatory".

Basically, they're worried about being sued, but if you're that much of a deadbeat, you're hardly going to get your act together to launch a lawsuit, are you?

After all, it would rather hinder your own case.

NEVER A TRUER WORD ...

Due to this column's unapologetic support for most -- stress, most -- of what Israel does, as well as our unflinching belief in their right to exist in safety without being attacked by their genocidal neighbours, we are often accused of being a paid sleeper agent for Mossad.

It's all offensive rubbish, of course, because those mean buggers refuse to cough up any money, no matter how many invoices they are sent.

But despite that, there's no doubt that amidst the cranks, lunatics and anti-Semites among the pro-Palestinian lobby, there are also people of good conscience who are simply wrong.

And tonight sees a meeting of the Ireland-Palestine Solidarity Campaign, the flyer for which says: "All ages and nationalities are welcome. You don't have to know a lot about Middle Eastern politics to get involved."

Yup, you don't have to know a lot about the Middle East to join a group that is focused on the Middle East -- nice logic, lads and laddettes.

Irish Independent

Today's news headlines, directly to your inbox every morning.

Don't Miss