Ian O'Doherty: You are what you eat? Stop eating idiots, then
The clever, big, mature, grown up and, dare we say, concerned way for any columnist to start a piece about obesity is to take a deep breath and intone that: "We have a serious and complicated relationship with food in this country. We have an obesity epidemic."
Actually, we don't.
True, there is a growing rise of obesity – but it's not an epidemic. Cholera is an epidemic. As is typhus.