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Ian O'Doherty: Nice to see she learned her lesson. . .

Remember Lyndie England? England was the female US MP in Abu Ghraib who posed for those infamous shots where she is pictured humiliating naked prisoners.

It was a stupid, reckless, dangerous and irresponsible thing to do in the first place. To then take pictures of the event was mind-blowingly thick and as a result of their publication, terrorist attacks on American interests around the world went through the roof. And, of course, it fed into the lazy anti-American stereotype that all their service people are deranged sadists.

She has now served her sentence and is back home in West Virginia.

But she ain't happy.

And she certainly ain't apologising.

In fact, of the inmates she says: "Their lives are better. They got the better end of the deal. And you want me to apologise to them? That's like apologising to the enemy."

Interestingly, she says she can't find work and claims to be paranoid, believing that people are following her.

What you mean she can't get a job?

Well, I suppose having a job where you strip men naked and then picture yourself mocking them are relatively thin on the ground.

Another sign that the economy is in the tank, I suppose.

BUT IT'S FREEDOM OF EXPRESSION!

The swastika incident in Bagenalstown is rather bizarre.

Here you have a small town in rural Ireland -- and one of the houses was flying a big bloody swastika, much to the shock of a councillor who immediately went to the gardai to complain.

Locals admitted to being perplexed, and even though it has now been taken down it's still a talking point in the area.

Was it to show resistance to the Bolshevik hordes of neighbouring Kilkenny?

After all, you can't be too careful when it comes to the Red Menace -- although on this occasion it's the Black And Amber Menace.

Or maybe it's a survivor from the oft overlooked Waffen SS Bagenalstown Kommando which fought with such distinction on the Eastern Front?

Oh wait, hang on.

I think I might have dreamt that one.

I really need to stop watching the Military Channel just before I go to bed.

WHAT A CAPITAL DECISION ...

How do you feel about working?

Do you see it as a necessary, if occasionally unpleasant, fact of life?

Do you wake up every morning, as I do, singing the Company Song, desperate to get in early so you can meet up with all your lovely colleagues and your kind, understanding boss?

Or, like Cait Reilly, who has won her human rights case in Britain, are you a bit picky about roles you will take on?

Reilly has been receiving Job Seekers Allowance for the last two years, and when it was suggested that she spend two weeks work experience in Poundland she sued, saying that as a highly qualified geology student, packing shelves was for other people. You know the kind: the great unwashed who don't have a degree.

She claimed that it was tantamount to slave labour, which is slightly over-egging the pudding a bit -- after all, working in 100-degree heat picking cotton while being beaten and abused is slightly more serious than filling a shelf with tins of beans.

She was joined in her action by another man who refused to take on the work, claiming that it was "an assault on his human dignity".

For supposedly smart people, I wonder just what part of 'Job Seekers Allowance' don't they understand?

TRULY, A MATCH MADE IN HEAVEN

It's important to have goals in life.

You know yourself, we all have little milestones that we hope to achieve.

And for most of us that also includes losing a few pounds. Nothing too radical, but with the summer coming up we could all do with shedding a couple.

But not Susanne Eman (pictured).

The Arizona native currently weighs 54 stone and says her goal is to hit a whopping 115 stone -- making her the largest human ever.

And she's getting married.

Suitably, the guy she's marrying is a chef and she says: "He loves to cook and I love to eat so it's perfect."

She then goes on to say that: "Big is beautiful. I want to break the stigma that being fat is bad."

Nope, weighing 54 stone and being virtually bed-bound while being warned by doctors that you are going to die is a perfectly normal way of life, isn't it?

A DOUBLE-EDGED SWORD?

Everyone is thrilled at the news that a vast reserve of oil has been found in Irish waters.

But remember one thing -- it was found off the coast of Cork.

If Corkonians become as rich as Saudis, we're bloody done for -- we'll all be forced to worship Roy Keane; Micheal Martin will be made Taoiseach for life; Dubs will be forced to walk one step behind everyone else; and it will be illegal for anyone not to own at least three Frank And Walters albums -- and anyone found guilty of that crime will be forced to move to a camp in Mayfield for political re-education.

I tell yiz, it's going to get messy.

Irish Independent