Thursday 23 November 2017

'People speak only of the hole. It's the only show in town and is our Fungie'

'People around here are obsessed with potholes. There are about 20,000 votes in potholes, if the last election is anything to go on. Right now the hole is the only show in town. We talk of little else'. Stock photo: Getty
'People around here are obsessed with potholes. There are about 20,000 votes in potholes, if the last election is anything to go on. Right now the hole is the only show in town. We talk of little else'. Stock photo: Getty
Billy Keane

Billy Keane

The hole lore is the only topic of conversation now that we can't face talking about since Dublin beat us in the football back in August. Sane Dave tells a fellow customer the drilling they hear is from a dentist who lives next door. It's like The Somme outside the front door. There's a huge trench as deep as a well, with men working day and night.

The Government are bringing natural gas through the town in a big fancy pipe and fixing up the road so that when the job is finished the once lunar-like surface will be as smooth as the top of a cheesecake.

The hole street is called William Street and this is the street where I have spent most of my life ever since I was born here.

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