Billy Keane: 'Old Stager' takes the reins to stop Booleen boasting for another year
'Alright so", says The Old Stager, "I'll make my comeback." Men drink deep and are silent. The only sound in the packed pub is the cracking and spitting of the logs in the hearth.
The news of The Old Stager's comeback does not go down well. He hasn't played for years. His belly is roundy and well established. There is no public response to his announcement.
Soon, the hum builds back up, and in quiet corners there are whisperings and mutterings. The Old Stager takes no notice. He's forever young. Home he goes and does 20 push-ups before he goes to bed. His missus takes a peep out from under the duvet and pretends she's asleep.