Sunday 26 May 2019

Biscuits for breakfast, crisps for supper

The one routine I have kept up is getting into the sea. Photo: David Conachy
The one routine I have kept up is getting into the sea. Photo: David Conachy
Brendan O'Connor

Brendan O'Connor

People are very fond of telling you that you wouldn't be happy if you were idle. Maybe it's how they keep the system going. By convincing all of us that we would get depressed if we didn't work.

Any time I get into a frank conversation with a rich person, I invariably end up saying to them that if I had a load of money I wouldn't bother working. I would just sit on my batty somewhere sunny. And they tell me in sonorous, paternalistic tones that when it came to it, I actually wouldn't, that I think that but actually work is fun and challenging and necessary to a fulfilled life.

Even my friends, whenever anything arises about how one would love to win the lottery or whatever, tell me authoritatively that I would go crazy without work and structure to my day, etc.

Well, I finally got a chance to try it - and I can confirm that as far as we can tell this far into the experiment, I'm doing fine. I'm loving it.

To be honest with you, I didn't even want to write this piece, and I have completely forgotten how to do it.

I am currently in the middle of the second of two weeks off. And there's no hiding place. Because we're not on holiday anywhere, or in the sun, or anything else escapist like that. We are at home, in our house, the kids are here ALL THE TIME because there's no such things as a babysitter during the Christmas period, and life is proceeding as normal. But I just don't have to go to work.

And it's amazing. I actually feel like a completely different person. In fact I think I am a different person. I've gone slightly feral, slightly hippie, slightly slobbish, and very relaxed. This morning I turned around and went back to sleep until about half past nine, and I didn't even have the heebie jeebies for the rest of the day about not being up early to get on top of the day. My main concern was that I had missed the half-way point in the tide, which is when I like to swim.

But you know what? I headed out anyway and swam in a full tide. Because why do I have to be so rigid about everything? That was the old me.

The one routine I have kept up is getting in the sea once or twice a day to numb myself against life for a few hours. That's the basic backbone of my day, and then around that I do things I never get to do. For a few days I used to return mid-morning to sit on the bed, light a scented candle and read a book. I didn't even know I liked scented candles. Sometimes I would even doze off for a while. IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DAY.

I have also done things like walking around aimlessly with friends talking crap for hours. I do stuff like hoovering, tidying up various drawers, and of course a bit of leaf hoovering between storms.

Obviously there has been a certain amount of drinking but I have left good breaks in between to stave off the depression. I have also, I will admit, been eating rather a lot, and rather erratically - biscuits for breakfast, crisps for supper... you get the gist.

And I've watched a lot of vaguely funny but ultimately substandard comedy movies that I wouldn't have time for in my real life. I have time for them now because time has no value to me. I have loads of it to waste.

So to anyone who thinks that winning the lotto or becoming a dot com billionaire would ruin your life, take it from me, there is life beyond work and being productive.

OK, so I'm getting fatter by the day, I drink too much and I'm becoming slightly more braindead and boring than usual. I have to think to figure out what day of the week it is and I'm constantly surprised by what time it is. But then again, who cares? Because none of it matters.

Sunday Indo Living

Today's news headlines, directly to your inbox every morning.

Don't Miss

Editor's Choice