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Why not every female lover is loud and proud

MEN have never been so worried. Thousands are scrambling to websites looking for answers. "Am I doing something wrong?" posts one man on an internet forum. "My wife never makes a sound during sex, ever, but she says she's having a good time? I'd love an answer from a woman on this please.".

Little did housewife Caroline Cartwright know that not only would her noisy love-making sessions result in an embarrassing court case, but also in a flurry of panicked men wondering why their lovers aren't screaming so loud "it sounds unnatural".

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