Mel's latest meltdown might spell the end of his career -- in asterisks
Seasoned wordsmiths have been struggling all week to adequately convey the force of Mel Gibson's alleged tirades against his ex-girlfriend, Oksana Grigorieva.
The result has been lots of asterisks and a wholesale resort to words like "horrifying" and "monstrous". Yet as anyone who has heard the tapes will understand, it's a hopeless task. When Mel lets loose, time stands still. The world wobbles on its axis. The last time anyone witnessed eruptions like these, European airspace had to be shut down.
How does he manage it? The quality of the abuse is impressive enough -- and the multi-profanity pile-ups are of a truly arresting scale. But it's the off-script sound effects that give you an idea of just how cross Mel really is: the gasps for breath, the gurglings, and those intriguing "plumph-plumph" noises, presumably as his eyeballs leave and re-enter their sockets.