Wednesday 22 November 2017

A proclamation once again

Laugh, and the world laughs with you. Pull an April Fool's Day prank, and chances are you'll be laughing alone. This year brought the usual avalanche of lame gags, including a claim that the Spire was going to be taken down during next year's centenary of the Rising. Well, hold my sides in case they split from hilarity. Then again, was that any dafter than Enda Kenny's joke about wanting to rewrite the 1916 Proclamation? It was a joke, right? If so, the Taoiseach really needs to work on his timing, because he told it a day early, forcing handlers to jump in and "clarify" What Enda Really Meant. Namely, that he wasn't rewriting the Proclamation personally, merely looking forward to Irish schoolchildren doing it for him as part of the 2016 celebrations. Yeah, like that idea is any better. Prepare for a repeat of the South Park episode where Eric Cartman travels back in time to 1776 and changes the US Declaration of Independence to include the words: "PS. Every Thursday should be Free Ice Cream Day." Instead of worrying about some old bit of paper, we should probably just use 2016 as an opportunity to admit that this whole independence thing hasn't really worked out the way we expected, and to invite someone else to take over for a while. The smart money's on the Germans. As are the shiny jackboots.

Eilis O'Hanlon

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