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Top tips to recover from a break-up


Surround yourself with supportive family and friends

Surround yourself with supportive family and friends

Surround yourself with supportive family and friends

Break-up Coach Fionnuala Wall offers her advice to help you get over the break-up of your relationship.

Here are Wall's six steps for getting over your ex and leading a more fulfilled life.

Cut contact

Difficult yes, but this is the only way the grieving process will begin. You are doing yourself a huge favour by staying away from social media at this time.

Put all photos, belongings, gifts from and reminders of your ex out of sight. Your brain will be triggered to go back into the past every time you see something that reminds you of your ex.

These will remind you of the 'happy times', which will have you doubting the break-up, overshadowing why the break-up actually came about in the first place.

If you're ready to actually throw them away then that's even better, as material objects hold energy.

Keep a journal

Journalling your feelings and thoughts is extremely helpful in working through the volume of emotions that you will go through during a break-up.

Sadness, anger, guilt… all of these feelings will surface at different stages, sometimes all at once, overwhelming you as you are dealing with the break-up. Get them on paper - it will help you to work through them.

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Cry as many tears as you need to. You will feel like bursting into tears many times throughout the day - this is normal. Find a private place and let your tears flow, it's your body's natural way of dealing with the new void in your life. Holding them back creates an emotional block.

Surround yourself with supportive family and friends

Friends or family members may suggest going for nights out to 'help you' deal with your break-up - I would strongly recommend avoiding alcohol or drugs to numb your pain.

You are going through a rollercoaster of emotions, which your body is trying to process.

Drugs and alcohol are anti-depressants that will have you feeling worse off and will create a block in your emotions.

Also, suggestions that meeting someone else soon after your break-up is not helpful. You need to work through what happened in your relationship so that you can avoid experiencing heartbreak again.

Find your passion

Discover what hobbies and interests you would love to pursue. Right now your focus is solely on a void in your life.

Going through this crisis will have you questioning where your life is going and what you want out of your life now. This is a real treasure if pursued.

Going through a crisis gives you an opportunity to create a life that you never thought possible.

Look after yourself

On all four levels - physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually, your body is processing a lot, so it is important to look after yourself as best you can.

You may not be sleeping well or will experience interrupted sleep with the shock.

Try to get eight hours sleep, exercise (not too intense as your body is feeling more tired than you realise right now) and, importantly, eat a healthy diet.

The 'chocolate for break-ups' myth is not helpful; your body needs nutritious food.

For information on Fionnuala Wall's break-up coaching services, visit www.fionnualawall.com

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