Thursday 21 November 2019

My Pet: Kiki tells it like it is, blood and all


John Haskins

I never cease to be amazed at humans' inability to live in the now.

Large brain size doesn't seem to correlate with wisdom. Grandad (that's what they call him) is big into meditation and bores the pants off people telling them about the importance of the now.

Yet if truth be told, he spends half the time worrying about the past and the other half worrying about the future. An amazing and inexplicable obsession for an otherwise intelligent man.

Though calling me Kiki wasn't super intelligent and was too girly even for a female dog.

It's not that I don't practice what I preach. Bad things happen, even to dogs. But living in the now gets you through. Let me illustrate.

Last year, Grandad got his brother to mind me for a few days. Long story short, the brother's very large dog (I'm only a tiny one) took an instant dislike to me and a lot of blood ended up on the kitchen walls. It wasn't all mine as when the brother tried to intervene with his arm, in the heat of battle I couldn't differentiate between human and canine flesh.

In any event, the brother and I ended up in A&E and his dog was sent to doggy heaven. He'd had a go at the local postman a few weeks before, so I suppose he was already half-way there. I spent a few months in UCD and it was no holiday but I'm proud of my scars and bumps.

My point, however, is that it's completely in the past. There's nothing I can do about it and it's as if it never happened. I'm alive and in good form.

Grandad thought I was suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder but then Grandad is a human. He didn't see that it takes a while to get your eating back to normal when half your insides have been chewed up.

So here's my point. We dogs have the key to happiness in life and it's such a pity that so many humans don't seem to appreciate our insight. It's not that we don't tell them.

Obviously we use a much more sophisticated communication system than words. It must be tough being confined to five senses - although a few of them can sometimes tune in to the wavelength we use. Owners are mostly better at this than non-owners, but our secret is available to all.

That's what's behind our unconditional love.

We love and greet you always with hearts unconditioned by either past or future. We're a wonderful gift to each other. Let's enjoy life together.

John Haskins, Louisburgh Co Mayo

Name: Kiki

Finest hour: Surviving the war

Likes: Grandad

Dislikes: Uniformed personnel

If you would like your pet featured in this column please send a story of 440 words and a photograph to clearly labelled MY PET

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