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I'm worried the mental health of parents is under threat. Yesterday I Googled 'is it postnatal depression or pandemic?'

Sophie White


The Lockdown Diaries

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Sophie White

Sophie White

Sophie White

Animals in captivity often display repetitive functionless behaviours. Watching my six-year-old pace the yard last week I felt a palpable grief for what he is going through. It reminded me of a haggard tiger I once saw in a zoo - not a place I think I'll ever feel right visiting again after lockdown.

The tiger also paced, it had a funny head-shaking movement and bald patches that further reading makes me think might have been as a result of over-grooming - another example of repetitive functionless behaviour that is often seen in captive animals. Not a problem anyone in my family is experiencing - in pandemic I have embraced under-grooming: keeping my hair in permanent braids and just washing the fringe over the sink. Such a time-saver and a pandemic behaviour I may just bring with me to the world beyond lockdown - whenever and whatever that might be.

Captivity seems like a slightly histrionic word to use for what we're experiencing right now, but downplaying the trauma and impact of lockdown was me in week five. Me in week 11 has a new plan. I want to haul my demented self and my three wild, pacing, snarling children down to the Dáil and I want to unleash them on our non-government. I relay the plan to my husband.