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Ask Allison: ‘Since my husband died, my adult son ghosts me. Should I keep trying to have a relationship?’

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It is understandably hurtful and frustrating if your children don't return your calls. Stock image.

It is understandably hurtful and frustrating if your children don't return your calls. Stock image.

It is understandably hurtful and frustrating if your children don't return your calls. Stock image.

Our resident therapist answers your queries about life and relationships.

Q: I have a son in his 30s and I have always done my best by him, as did his father when he was alive. My husband died five years ago. The thing is, I am the one doing all the calling and visiting. My son never makes effort to contact me. When I call to chat, he takes a while to warm up and, even though we do eventually have a nice conversation, it is after I cajole him by complimenting him. I could have done with more support over the last few years and not once did he call me to see how I was. I gave him a significant portion of his inheritance after his father died to help him buy a house and I can’t help but think that now he doesn’t need me, he couldn’t be bothered. I tested my theory out by not calling him for six weeks and lo and behold, he didn’t make any contact. I am tempted to stop altogether as I find it infuriating. Would that be awful?


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