Thursday 24 May 2018

'Between 10am in the doctor’s and 12pm in hospital my baby was gone' - Mother on how daughter died of meningitis

Members of 'Lola's Ball' committee
Ruth Melling and daughter Lola Jane Nagle

Ruth Melling

An Irish mother has described how her 17-month-old daughter fell ill and died from meningitis in a matter of hours. Limerick woman Ruth Melling lost her daughter Lola Jane Nagle just over two years ago. Next month her family and friends will host the second annual Lola's Ball in Limerick. This is her story:

"Lola Jane was a very happy, healthy little girl.  On the night of the 14th of April 2015, Lola woke with a temperature. I brought her into bed with me as she was incredibly restless. She wasn't crying just wide awake staring at me and breathing funny. I couldn't seem to get her temperature down. She was just lying there.

The next morning, after no sleep, I knew she needed to go to the doctor. It was a crazy time at work for me as my boss was away so I had to get in and open up for everyone. So I left Lola with my husband went out to work, opened up, rang the doctor and headed straight back home for Lola. 

When I got home she was still lying there and I noticed her breathing had got worse and a few purple marks on her neck. I immediately thought chicken pox, how wrong I was.

Lola Jane Nagle
Lola Jane Nagle

I put Lola into the car and headed for the doctors, it's a drive I will never forget. I still see the way she was looking at me in the mirror sometimes when I close my eyes, I will never be able to describe it but I knew there was something seriously wrong with my little girl. 

As her breathing became worse, I began to panic.  I rushed into the doctors with her and I was shaking.  Once I sat in the waiting room, I watched these purple spots take over her body and then her lips went blue. I ran to reception screaming “her lips are blue her lips are blue”.

I was rushed into nurse’s room and two doctors appeared. They put an oxygen mask on Lola, I kept crying “what's wrong with her?” They mentioned meningitis and I told them “no, it can't be sure she's had all her injections”.

They made me go outside for air and told me they were ringing an ambulance and to phone somebody to meet me at the hospital. At this stage I was numb I had no idea what was happening I just kept saying it couldn't be meningitis. 

The ambulance arrived at the surgery and I took my little girl into my arms while they tried to control her breathing. This was the last time I held my baby alive.

The sirens went on and they told me it was only because of traffic. How naive I was to think everything was okay.

We got to the hospital where a team of doctors were waiting, she was whipped out of my arms and I was asked to sit while I watched them all around my baby.  A lot of what happen after this is a blur. I sat alone in the room watching and still not realising what was going on.  A few doctors tried to speak to me to tell me how serious it was but I heard nothing I was just numb.

I remember my husband arriving and trying to talk to me to tell me to say goodbye to our little girl. I couldn't move I couldn't get off the chair, and then she was gone. From 10am in the doctor’s surgery to 12pm in the hospital my baby was gone.  How? Why? I don't think I will ever understand it, she was perfect only the day before so happy and full of life, my angel Lola Jane.

It's so strange. Lola was born six weeks premature and fought hard to stay with us. She had no lashes when she was born but by the time she left hospital to come home she was called Lola Lashes by all the nurses, they were beyond long.

I'm not sure if it was a sixth sense or maybe somehow I knew to protect her but I was a crazy overprotective mom when it came to Lola. Everyone that knows me knows how laid back I am, but with Lola I was constantly watching her, following her, she was never out of my sight. 

I was so paranoid about her choking, that I did two first aid courses and wouldn't dare even give her a sausage. You would think I would be like that now with my son Scott, but no it was only Lola.  I adored her, she was with my every minute, my special girl.  

We had a very special bond and I miss her terribly.  I can still hear her breathing and see the way she was looking at me in the car on the way to the doctor’s. I don't think it will ever leave my mind how scared she must have been.

Act for Meningitis have been an amazing support to our whole family, I have built a strong friendship with them and will continue to help in any way, to prevent this happening to someone else."

Lola's Ball will take place on April 22 at the Greenhills Hotel in Limerick. 'A gift for Lola' was set up to prevent another family going through the nightmare of losing a child by raising awareness of the signs and symptoms of Meningitis. To date it has raised over €35,000

Members of 'Lola's Ball' committee


Meningitis is inflammation of the lining around the spinal cord and the brain, caused by a viral or bacterial infection. 

It is easily misdiagnosed as the symptoms can be flu-like, appear in any order and some may not appear at all, therefore we urge people to trust your instincts. Meningitis does not always produce a rash, if it does appear it will not fade under pressure.  

While children aged under five are most at-risk, with 16-24 year olds the second highest at risk age group.

Symptoms of Meningitis can include:  Fever, vomiting, headache, limb pain, neck stiffness, sensitivity to bright lights, confusion and in some cases a rash may appear. 

For more information on Meningitis, our support services or to download the signs and symptoms card please visit here

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