Ireland is in Group C -- also known as the group of debt -- with Italy, Spain and Croatia. Germany have won the most European Championship titles and are one of the favourites to win.
The offside rule is not complicated for women to understand. Men get confused because it involves multi-tasking between two different positions, that of the goal line and the opposition player. That's generally why there is eye raising and subtle tut-tuts when you ask them to explain.
Men don't understand it themselves and are incapable of watching the game on television and outlining the rules at the same time. So, it might be helpful today to say something along the lines of "Robbie Keane is not offside, the ref can only decide from the time the ball was played, not from when he received the pass."
The Croatian defender, Vedran Corluka, is not Luka from the TV programme ER. The European Championship trophy is not named after the French striker that cheated Ireland out of a World Cup place with his handball goal. The Henri Delaunay cup is in honour of the association's first general secretary.
If things are looking good for Ireland on Thursday against Spain, earn plaudits by saying: "Thank God the Barcelona pairing of Carles Payol and David Villa are injured." Use the same ploy on Monday week during the Italy game, but this time say Giuseppe Rossi.
The average age of the tournament's well-pampered football players is 26, the same age as Katie Taylor. A Wicklow woman with four World medals and nine European Championship medals under her belt, Katie is Ireland's most successful boxer, male or female. She is Ireland's best prospect of a gold medal at the Olympics but trains in a gym without toilet or shower facilities. Katie was also an Irish soccer international and was sent off when she played Italy in 2008. I'd pay to watch what happens if a man dismisses Katie when she comments on the offside rule.
AS I understand it, Trap believes that only two of the Irish players are any good. They would be Robbie Keane and Shay Given. And maybe, at a stretch, the Duffer. He would regard Richard Dunne as being extraordinarily good for someone who plays his football essentially with a pub team, but by the proper Italian standards? No.
Don't ask the boyfriend or husband to explain the offside rule. He might know it, but there's no way he can explain it without the use of matchstick diagrams or moving the salt and pepper pots around the table in some primitive diorama.