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Greens just can't shake off the strong whiff of FF

THE ejector pod was launched two weeks ago -- but the decontamination period is just ramping up.

The Greens are safely out of Planet Biffo (nee Bertie) and they're scrubbing off the dirt as furiously as Lady Macbeth rubbing imaginary bloodstains from her hands.

John Gormley took a brillo pad to the FF germs yesterday, in the hope that Enda and Eamon might pick up his party and give it a home after the election.

Some chance -- since Fine Gael and Labour are unlikely to need a small green pimple stuck to the backside of their predicted whopping majority.

Fianna Fail wouldn't listen to our plans for political reform, said John at the Greens' modest election launch in the 'Sugar Club' in Dublin.

We really wanted to go for a rainbow coalition in 2007 but had to go in with Bertie, he added.

But, despite showing a bit of leg to Enda and Eamon, he was still giving out to them for being unrealistic on the economy.

The Greens will be following the four-year plan agreed between them and, eh. . . those other fellas.

"What I perceive there is a clash of egos, as well as a clash of polices. And very often in politics, the human aspect can lead to disintegration," John said of Fine Gael and Labour.

"What we have here in many ways is a recipe for disaster. The Greens could get in there and keep them apart a little bit."

John insisted that his party would not be "incinerated" and that people would recognise their achievements.

So what have the Greens ever done for us?

Their climate change and Dublin mayor bills went belly up when they pulled out of government.

They banned stag-hunting and admittedly did drive through substantial changes to the planning laws. Paul Gogarty consistently added to the gaiety of the nation.

But there's still a bit of FF dirt under the Green fingernails.

"What this election is showing is that Fianna Fail has been in Government for far too long," said John -- seemingly forgetting who kept them in there.

"And the opposition parties have been in opposition far too long because what they are coming up with is not credible when it comes to government policy."

Hang on. Brian Lenihan said almost exactly the same thing when launching his failed bid for leadership of FF two weeks ago.

Out, damn'd spot, out -- you've got to scrub a whole lot harder, John.

Irish Independent