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The Twits: Young grasshopper Micheal puts foot in it Father Ted style

PERHAPS Micheal Martin had better take a leaf out of Father Ted's book, and start backtracking, rapidly.

"The Chinese: a great bunch of lads," the Craggy islander blustered, amid suggestions that he was being a tad racist.

But the Fianna Fail leader's cringe-worthy attempt at a Chinese accent committed the cardinal sins of sounding French and not being funny. He was pilloried.

"Micheal Martin, you have much to learn about imitating Chinese, young grasshopper," the succinctly named Jim said. Others kept the Ted references coming.

"I see Michael Martin is out there being racist about the Chinese. The big racist," said John McGuirk, an Independent candidate.

Needless to say, Enda had very specific instructions from his handlers as he met with Angela Merkel: 'Don't. Mention. The. War.'

Of course, John Cleese mentioned it once but reckoned he got away with it. He was also in 'Monty Python', and they had a little ditty that the Twitterati believe will be of interest to Mr Martin: "I like Chinese, I like Chinese/Their food is guaranteed to please/A 14, a seven, a nine, and lychees."

Those who could stop sniggering at Micheal for a minute decided to list the ways that Enda might 'accidentally' miss the flight home from Germany, ensuring he would miss another TV debate.

"Enda Kenny seen wearing Osama bin Laden outfit and shouting 'BOMB' in attempt to get arrested in Germany," Eamonn Sullivan said.

Irish Independent