Love Island 2019: A lad from Limerick enters the Villa, and Joanna calls Michael a 'snake' for not leaving!
We'll get to "professional rugby player, 24-year-old Greg O'Shea from Limerick" (G'wan, The Maura!) shortly. But first: after "the mother of all cliffhangers", it was obvious the Islanders would choose Michael to stay.
Hey, it may be called Love Island but sometimes Friendship Island reigns. Michael certainly didn't choose "love", he chose what was best for him. Again.
There he was, "the happiest" he's ever been since Joanna came into the Villa. And he chose to stay.
Joanna, being the diplomatic sort, had this to say during her exit interview (you know, after she called him a "snake" to his face): "Part of me expected Michael to leave with me. However, I don’t want to be in control of someone’s life journey and if he wants to continue in the villa, to get to know someone else or see where things go, I’ve got respect for that. It is a bit disappointing but I’d never hold that against him."
As for him having another crack at Amber, considering she put herself "on the table" at the not-at-all-cringe Island "nightclub" (really, it was just another house, with the now fabled "shop assistant" serving behind the "bar"), angelic Joanna had this to impart...
"Me and Michael will have to see how he gets on whilst he is in the villa and when he gets out. So for now there is a pause on us. You never know if he’s going to crack on with Amber. If they’re meant to be, they will be. If they do get together and are happy, I’ll be happy for them."
As it happens, Michael went out of his way to be brutal towards Amber near the end of tonight's show. First, he ordered her to "sit down" (twice) before essentially saying "I want nothing to do with you, and don't think otherwise."
Michael is so hell-bent on Amber not "winning" whatever they're in competition about, he's entirely convinced himself he "feehlz naw'thin" for her and will most likely try to hook up with either of the below...
NEWBIE HARLEY BRASH
The 20-year-old estate agent from Newcastle does have a name straight out of an action movie, but she also has the added bonus of having a Geordie accent. All Michael would have to do is close his eyes. Then again, he'll probably face stiff competition in the form of one Curtis Pritchard.
Unfortunately for Curtis, he doesn't feature in the lineup of Islanders Harley has her eye on. They are, in order of preference: Ovie (obviously), Anton (bye bye, Belle), and (well, what are the odds?!) Michael – who Haley feels is "misunderstood".
There is one crippling downside for Hayley, however... she finds "arrogance a turn off." Yer in the wrong place, love.
NEWBIE INDIA REYNOLDS
This 28-year-old model from Reading claims she is "fun and wild!" Well, she is from the Berkshire town of Reading... As for the people she's got a peeper on, they include the (very) obvious choices of Ovie and Michael.
Finally, some LOvie action!! With such an onslaught of attention being thrown in his general direction, will Amber start to explore any romantic inklings for her current bedfellow?!
Much like Harley, India doesn't like "arrogance" or "cocky boys" so, yep, great choice of high-profile televised dating show, there.
NEWBIE GREG O'SHEA
He's a "clean freak" and "broke his face" last year and, as a result, he now rates himself a humble "seven out of 10." However, there's only one everyone's thinking... ISHEINTOMAURA???ISHEINTOMAURA???ISHEINTOMAURA???
Well, when asked who he had his eye on, Greg said: "I’d say me and Maura will hit it off straight away, being two Irish people and she’s hilarious. She’s very naturally funny and she’s gorgeous as well, so you never know..."
Sadly for Greg, she's after spending forever badgering impromptu love interest Curtis into choosing her. They then sealed the deal with a proper tongue lashing on The Terrace.
• Grabbing the resident sounding board for a chat, Anton bleated the following at Curtis while reclined on a set of beanbags: "Do I really want someone that can talk about me in that manner when they’re annoyed?”
So, in other words, Anton wants a quiet little bird who won't kick off whenever he acts the maggot for the purpose of "lad bants". Anton, meet Hayley, etc, etc.
• Michael looking at pictures of Joanna on his phone the following morning... I mean, EVEN TOMMY GETS HE SHOULD'VE LEFT?!
• "I told the girl that I've got her, and then I let her walk out on her own... I feel lihck and dihck." You look like one too, mate.
• Chris saying "Any more cliches?? Any more for any more?!" was everything... OK, I was going to go with Maura discussing her pulsating unmentionables but, you know, it's not really for polite society...
• "Sit down..." WTAF?!
Maura instantly regrets getting with Curtis once a certain Limerick lad walks through the door...?Lorraine Courtney: 'If we want women to be taken seriously, we should dump 'Love Island' and Ladies' Day'