Thursday 22 March 2018

PS I Hate You

The Clintons had one. Homer Simpson had one. And now it turns out that Joan Rivers had one too. A shitlist that is.

Melissa Rivers revealed last week that her mother kept a file on all the people she hoped would die in a plane crash, sort of like PS I Love You with a 9/11 voodoo doll element. It's just one of the intriguing facts that Melissa dishes in her new memoir about her mother which, if you ask us, will be ruined slightly by the fact that Joan pre-approved of the whole project.

Hollywood child memoirs are only fun if the child is attacking the parent, like the daughters of Joan Crawford and Bette Davis did. The tradition is that the child speaks ill of the famous dead and we all act appalled, as if we had no inkling whatsoever that an imperious and massively powerful star might have ever acted like a tyrant in their own home.

And then we expect the gory details. We want career-related tantrums, children used as promo props and dinnertime psychological warfare; learning that Joan Rivers wanted the whole book "ready to go" on her death, and even suggested calling it "Comedienne Dearest", sort of spoils the whole idea. For the sake of the movie script let's just pray there's at least a wire coat hanger or two in there somewhere.

Donal Lynch

Sunday Independent

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