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I'll never be a slim gym bunny

I don't buy magazines anymore but I do read them when I go to the hairdressers and I'm fascinated by the weekly assessment in one of them on the food that celebs have in their frig. Now we all know it's made up and it's not really their frig, but the amount of green stuff in there is frightening.

And now my frig is beginning to resemble that of a celeb. Green stuff. Lettuce, broccoli, cucumber, spinach. I'm stunned when I open it. And I'm even more stunned when I look into my shopping basket. It looks as if I picked up someone else's by mistake.

I don't know if this will continue but if I could get another stone off I'd be thrilled. I opened one of my underwear drawers the other day and found myself looking wistfully at all the sexy sets that I bought half price in Brown Thomas sale years ago. I'll get into them yet I said to myself. I like talking to myself. If I said it to someone else they'd probably fall around the place laughing.. I may wear nothing over them.

I have a fear of photos. I always seem to be in the foreground and consequently huge but when I saw photos of myself in France recently, I realised that I still have a long way to go. I was actually in the background in a few and still didn't exactly look like Kate Moss. I know I'll never be skinny again but able to wear fitted clothes with aplomb would be good.

I'll definitely have to embrace the whole exercise thing a bit better than I am. I really only like walking to the pub. Walking for the sake of it does my head in. Luckily the dog hates walking too and when I take him for a short walk, he spends the entire time endeavouring to go back home. But I'm going to have to get over myself and get out there. Nothing too strenuous. Just my weekly Pilates class and a few walks. The gym is over forever. Life is too short and at my stage of life I could do myself a serious injury.

Sunday Independent