Wednesday 22 October 2014

Things that go bump

Claire O'Mahony

Published 19/02/2013 | 14:48

Britain's Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge shows her bump
Britain's Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge shows her bump for the first time.
Britain's Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge receives flowers from children as she leaves Hope House addiction treatment centre after an official visit in London February 19, 2013.    REUTERS/Stefan Wermuth   (BRITAIN - Tags: ROYALS ENTERTAINMENT)
Britain's Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge receives flowers from children as she leaves Hope House addiction treatment centre after an official visit in London February 19, 2013. REUTERS/Stefan Wermuth (BRITAIN - Tags: ROYALS ENTERTAINMENT)
The Duchess of Cambridge pays a visit to the addiction charity Hope House treatment centre in Clapham, south London
The Duchess of Cambridge pays a visit to the addiction charity Hope House treatment centre in Clapham, south London

In the grand scheme of things, five months is not a particularly long time.

However, if you’re already fatigued with the royal babywatch, it’s going to feel like an eternity. Now that the Duchess of Cambridge, or Kate Middleton, as we still prefer to call her, has debuted the first glimpse of pregnancy bump, there will be no holding back as every bit of burgeoning belly gets papped, and discussed to the nth degree until her happy arrival in July.

 

Kate showed off her very neat bump today on a visit to Hope House, aan Action on Addiction women's treatment centre in London.

 

Wearing a flattering wrap dress is actually so neat that on another woman, she might just look like she’d had a big lunch – and no doubt whoever designed said dress can expect to sell out of them by tomorrow.

 

For no doubt, but Kate’s pregnancy has already been the most commented on gestation since time – or at least gossip blogs – began.

 

It’s impossible not to think she’s in a horrible position – after all, who else has to announce their pregnancy to the world before the standard 12-week period, as she did when chronic morning sickness led to her admission to hospital.

 

 

Pregnancy is not exactly a walk in the park for any women but other women don’t have to contend with their every outfit and gesture being hyper-analysed while they’re also having to put up with stretch marks, varicose veins and food cravings.

 

Kate’s showcasing of her bump comes on the same day that best-selling author Hilary Mantel launched a vicious and unprovoked attack on the Duchess, where she described her as ‘a shop-window mannequin, with no personality of her own, entirely defined by what she wore.’ She added: ‘a shop-window mannequin, with no personality of her own, entirely defined by what she wore.’

 

 

She added: “Presumably Kate was designed to breed in some manners.

‘She looks like a nicely brought up young lady, with “please” and “thank you” part of her vocabulary.”

 

She might have had the most incredible wedding ever and she’s never going to have to worry about paying the bills but between Mantel’s attack and the unleashing of bump-watch, we wouldn’t like to be in Kate’s LK Bennett courts for any money in the world.

 

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