Gwyneth Paltrow really didn't enjoy this year's Met Ball, and she wants everyone to know about it.
We've all been there. You spend a good few hours getting glammed up for a big night out only to end up in some sweaty, over-crowded sardine tin of a club. Your new suede shoes are repeatedly pelted with sticky drinks by worse-for-wear revellers as your perfectly-applied make-up slowly slides off your face and your previously-coiffed hair starts to stick limply to your brow. You spend most of the night inspecting the vastly-expanding sweat patches that are quickly commandeering your new silk top as you awkwardly shuffle (arms down, to hide the unsightly patches) to some music you don't like. Gross.
We can sympathise a little, then, with Gwyneth Paltrow who has said this year's Met Ball "sucked" for pretty much those reasons.
"It seems like the best thing in the world. You think, 'Oh my god, it's going to be so glamorous and amazing, and you're going to see all these famous people.', she told Australian DJs Kyle and Jackie O earlier this week. "And then you get there, and it's so hot, and so crowded, and everyone's pushing you. This year it was really intense. It wasn't fun!"
Add in some expert shouting by Mr Kanye West, who Paltrow says "was furious" as he performed (maybe he'd already got wind of the Kim Kardashian as sofa meme), a tiresome theme - Punk - that everyone is "a bit old to be dressed" suitably for and et voilà, you have yourself a Hollywood version of dodgy night out in Leicester Square.
So Gwyneth may have successfully kissed goodbye to ever being invited to the Wintour-helmed bash again, or indeed another US Vogue cover, but she has made it clear that just because an event is full of glamorous, famous people it doesn't guarantee that it'll actually be fun.
Bibby Sowray Telegraph.co.uk