Sunday 25 September 2016

So this is why men think that all women want to sleep with them

Sasha Brady

Published 12/02/2016 | 17:05

A new study has revealed why some men seem to believe that all women want to sleep with them.
A new study has revealed why some men seem to believe that all women want to sleep with them.

A new study has revealed why some men seem to believe that all women want to sleep with them.

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You probably know at least one man who thinks that every woman wants to sleep with him - from the barista in Starbucks who smiled at him on Tuesday as she handed over his coffee to the friend-of-a-friend who complimented his dress sense on the last group night out.

It may seem like those men are pretty self-assured when it comes to dating but a new study reveals that they're not as confident as they might seem.

In fact, their approach is influenced by a built-in neediness.

According to psychologists at Union College, New York, men with a habit of misinterpreting female attention can be placed at the higher end of an 'attachment' spectrum, meaning they have a fear of rejection and crave reassurance.

"This is due in part to the men's strong desire for intimacy," said Joshua Hart, associate professor of psychology and the lead author of the study which will be published in the April edition of the psychological journal: Personality and Individual Differences.

And those that at the opposite end, the shyer males, exhibit the opposite traits: a reluctance to trust others and fear of intimacy.

The study asked 500 men to imagine themselves catching the eye of an attractive woman in a nightclub.

The fictional woman smiles back and the men were then required to gauge just how interested she seemed, from "not at all interested" to "extremely interested".

Lastly, they were asked to say which end of the attachment spectrum they felt closest matches their own personality.

It was found that men who rank themselves at the higher end were significantly more likely to presume intense female attention, while those with a low attachment tendency consequently envisioned a woman uninterested in them.

"If you view yourself as being flirtatious, that biases you to seeing others as behaving similarly," Hart told the Daily Mail.

And men higher in attachment anxiety project their own flirtatiousness and sexual interest onto the woman, based on their hopes that she will reciprocate.

According to Hart: "Their lower interest in intimacy led them to be less interested in the fictional woman, thus seeing themselves as being less flirty, and in turn, imagining the woman as less sexually interested in them."

"We see in reality what we wish to see, not necessarily what's there," Hart said.

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