Sunday 24 September 2017

People reveal the signs that told them their their partners were cheating

Independent.ie Newsdesk

Independent.ie Newsdesk

Cheating is devastating - some couples can move past it, others sever ties straight away.

People took to Reddit to reveal the moment they knew their partner was cheating on them.

One user Cursethewind said she found out the very hard way - when she received a wedding invitation from her boyfriend's fiancee.

"I got mailed a wedding invitation by his fiance of four years that I had thought was just a good friend of his. That was not only a clear-cut sign he was cheating, but that I was the other woman and in second place," she wrote.

Another said she suspected her father of having an affair - she later learned he had a mistress for 10 years - due to his odd behaviour.

"My dad wasn't my partner, but I busted him for cheating on my mother when I suspected that him talking on the phone in the driveway for a half hour each night after she went to bed was not business-related. I don't even know if I should have done that; the marriage ended," Phlox_carolina wrote.

One woman said she grew concerned after her ex-boyfriend regularly accused of cheating with a number of people and became increasingly jealous.

"Every relationship I had that ended because I found out they were cheating had one common denominator: They frequently accused me of cheating," she wrote.

"For example, my last ex accused me of making plans to go cheat on them with an actor from tv. I didn't even know the actor's real name, I just thought the actor was cute. Cue huge fight. Find out later they've been cheating on me with "just a friend, don't worry". Five years later the ridiculousness of it still strikes me from time to time."

The common denominator for those cheating seems to be accusations that their other half is doing the dirt.

Tidmus shared: "My SO (significant other)says that she's afraid I WILL cheat on her, not that I have. It came up after I asked her why we haven't been having sex as much (we've had this talk quite a few times now).

"That's the one thing she worries about, that I will leave her or cheat on her. I mean, I continue to think she's honestly just insecure about it, but I hear all the time that this is a telltale sign of a cheater. She has cheated on others on the past and I just don't know what to think."

Two women said their ex-husbands grew more irritated as time went on and their sex lives deteriorated in the process.

"When my ex husband cheated on me he just seemed to work a lot more, and during periods where it was phone/online only he wouldn't let me say no to sex. It was no longer an option," KumaLumaChuma said.

"Also EVERYTHING I did was wrong or awful or stupid and I was the crazy, lazy, bitch.... He never did wrong. Although that could have been more down to his personality than the cheating."

Floofybear echoed her experience, saying: "Yes to all of this. Also, my ex had an excuse for everything and he called me crazy whenever I pointed out that his behavior was suspect. As long as he could keep me doubting myself, he felt like I was less likely to be caught.

"He also kept accusing me of cheating for absolutely no reason and he didn't want me to go out with friends. I noticed that he became openly hostile toward me and our son, as if we were some kind of burden that was holding him back.

"Finally, he moved his direct deposit into his own account without telling me."

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