'For blokes, the number of conquests is a sign of masculinity -- but a real man doesn't use a woman'
Published 03/10/2011 | 05:00
Meath singleton Ferghal McGrath (32) travels the country delivering the message of chastity to secondary school students with Catholic group Pure In Heart.
And practising what he preaches, he's abstaining from sex until he meets Miss Right.
"Everybody wants to find true love -- but the world tells you it's okay to sleep with everyone along the way. Before I joined Pure In Heart, I wasn't living a chaste life -- I didn't care about anyone or give a damn about a girl's feelings.
"Then after coming back into my faith in my mid-twenties, I went along to one of their prayer groups -- and it just made sense to me.
"These days, virginity is almost a dirty word. But chastity is not some medieval idea of wearing a chastity belt -- it's about love without regrets. I'm not saying that I'm a virgin, I'm not -- but if I could take it back, I would.
"When you're sleeping with someone, you're wrecked with worry about getting them pregnant or being good enough in bed.
"Since I started living a chaste life, dating is totally different. Suddenly, you get to see what the person is really like -- whether they're kind or would make a good mother.
"For blokes, the number of conquests you've had is almost a sign of masculinity -- but a real man doesn't use and abuse a woman. And to be honest, I wouldn't be very happy at the thought of somebody else doing that with my future wife.
"At least in a marriage, you know you're with someone who's got your best interests at heart.
"Years ago, it was men who treated women as notches on their bedpost -- now it's the other way around.
"When you go out, some girls are very forward. There have been times when it's nearly been offered on a plate -- and the temptation to settle can be difficult.
"At the end of the day, though, I have a heart and feelings just like a woman does. My friends slag me off and reckon that pent-up sexual energy will send me over the edge. But my energy is going where it should be going -- searching for the right person. And now I realise that I'm worth the wait, just like she is.
"Orgasm is brilliant, but it's only a fleeting moment -- true happiness lasts a lifetime."