independent

Friday 25 July 2014

I reckon most women like their men to be men - as in Real Men

Published 11/06/2013|05:38

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THERE was an article in the Sunday Times magazine last week about Every Woman's Dream man. Bear in mind the article was written by a man, so the thinking behind it was bound to be slightly skewed.

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The problem with this is, what men think women like is normally completely different to what women actually like. For example if Himself was asked who would be my dream man, I know he would say George Clooney because I once said he was a fine thing.

And he is a fine thing. But he wouldn't be my dream man by a long shot. George is too bland and slightly smarmy for my liking, which is obviously why I haven't been returning his calls!

Like many women I tend to find funny men attractive and have long held a secret crush on James Corden or even better, Vince Vaughan, except I'd never take Jennifer Anniston's 'hand me downs'. I like big cuddly men who can make me laugh and make me look delicate and petite beside them!

However, according to the Sunday Times, my dream man is someone who drinks but never gets drunk. Now where is the fun in that? You're knocking back the pinot grigio and he's nursing his first glass and smiling tolerantly at you as you fall off the couch? I don't think so.

Secondly, he should have a well-developed protective instinct. Well, yes, I get this. All women, whether we would admit it or not, like to feel there's someone there looking out for us. It's the whole knight in shining armour concept. We'll take that one.

But according to the ST, our dream man also needs to be able to carry off designer flip flops, hairbands, jewellery, cashmere hoodies and man bags? I think I'm safe enough on that front, Himself hasn't enough hair to put in a hairband, his hoody is from Penneys and he thinks manbags are for gays!! I reckon Vince and James would be in total agreement there.

Our dream man also, according to the Sunday Times, needs to have a good working knowledge of the female anatomy (surely that goes without saying?), and can spot the stirrings of PMT several days before you can. Only a man could write that because even if a man can spot the beginnings of PMT a mile off, he'd be an absolute lunatic to tell you!

He is also open to yoga and meditation (way too metrosexual for me), can do basic DIY and plumbing and considers the dustbins his department. The latter part of that sentence I am in total agreement with. I don't do bins or beer and I don't expect my man to do flower arranging or cupcakes.

The truth is women like their men to be men as in Real Men. Most of us don't want them to notice we bought new shoes (probably because they'd kill us!) or that we'd had our hair done (same reason as before) we just want them to be big and strong as Sinitta says.

And if he spends more time in front of the mirror than me, which admittedly would be hard, that's a total dealbreaker!

So George don't be expecting me to return your calls any time soon!

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