independent

Tuesday 21 May 2013

Zombie playtime

Madam – At the weekend I observed the children in our local park (in Dublin) playing a game new to me – 'chase the junkie'. The premise was to verbally abuse and shower debris upon the stuporous derelicts dotting the benches until they roused themselves to make chase. By the time each victim would lurch unsteadily to their feet, their giddy assailants would be 50 metres away, in hysterics at the shambling wreck attempting futile pursuit. While it gladdened the heart to see how our children would thrive in the event of a 'Walking Dead'-style zombie apocalypse, it was with some curiosity that I later absorbed the news that Dublin City Council was to designate such parks as official 'quiet areas'. One wonders how officials will enforce a 55db noise limit when they have thus far had little success in curtailing the drug dealing that takes place, or in controlling the aforementioned derelicts, who shoot up and booze up, then languish there for the rest of the day, shouting obscenities, casting aside used syringes, bottles and cans and vomiting, urinating and (I exaggerate not) defecating in front of all and sundry. Persuading the local youth to stop blaring Swedish House Mafia from their phones will presumably be even more difficult, given that the junkies are mere child's play to them.

(Name and address with Editor)

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